Global Warming Killed Nessie

A veteran Loch Ness Hunter has declared that the hunt for Nessie should be essentially called off. Despite having hundreds of sonar contacts over the years, the trail has since gone cold and Robert Rines believes that Nessie may be dead, a victim of global warming, says The Daily Record.

He still wants to check almost 100 contacts on the floor of the loch, believing one may be the monster’s remains.

So let me get this straight, we’re not sure he ever existed but we know how we killed him/her/it?

Now I’m especially worried about Bigfoot. I haven’t heard anything about him in years.

I would love being a global warming hysteric. But this logic thing keeps getting in the way.