The ‘Ya’ Know’ Ambassador to the Vatican
Caroline Kennedy may be the next ambassador to the Vatican, an Italian news magazine has claimed. HT Headline Bistro.
In an April 2 article in Panorama, journalist Carlo Rossella predicted that Caroline Kennedy – her own hopes to rise to the U.S. Senate dashed for now – has been suggested as the Obama administration’s ambassador to the Holy See.
Caroline Kennedy is famous for her accomplishments as a…Well, she’s famous. After trying to win an open seat in the Senate she narrowly lost to the open seat, mostly because of her inability to speak a full sentence coherently. And she dropped out of the “race” for “personal reasons.” Which is true if you count “personal reasons” as “I’m trying to avoid becoming even more of a national punchline than I already am.”
Rosella wrote that the appointment would be a favor to John Kerry who asked that Kennedy be made the administration’s Vatican ambassador.
Newsmax correspondent Edward Pentin reported April 2 that the administration has actually put forward three potential candidates – all of which were rejected by the Vatican due to their pro-abortion backgrounds.
So I’m imagining how the first meeting between Pope Benedict, Barack Obama and Caroline Kennedy would go:
Pope: Hello. Welcome to the Vatican. How are you two? I want to start off with talking about the dignity of human life. God is not solitude, but perfect communion. For this reason the human person, the image of God, realizes himself or herself in love, which is a sincere gift of self.
Obama: uh…uhm…The…uh guards stopped my teleprompter at the door so…uh…I think this is a very historic meeting because of the…uh…hold on now…historical nature of my presidency and…uh..uh…hold on now…here it comes…uh…I think my new Ambassador has something to say.
Caroline Kennedy: Uuuuuuuuhhhhhh…you know…I uh….you know…I’m Catholic ya’ know.
Pope: Yes I do know. What I’m saying is that we are moving toward a dictatorship of relativism which does not recognize anything as definitive and has as its highest value one’s own ego and one’s own desires… The church needs to withstand the tides of trends and the latest novelties…. We must become mature in this adult faith, we must guide the flock of Christ to this faith.”
Caroline: And I’m a Kennedy. Did I like…mention that? Yeah and you know…I think uh…
Pope: What? Listen, having a clear faith, based on the creed of the church, is often labeled today as a fundamentalism. … Whereas relativism, which is letting oneself be tossed and ‘swept along by every wind of teaching,’ looks like the only attitude acceptable to today’s standards…Are you two alright?
Caroline: Uh…you know.
Obama: Hold on now. I can’t hear myself think. Here it comes. Alright. Hold on now…Uhm. The 21st century…historic…uhm…
Caroline: Yeah, you know I…uh…you know.
Pope: I think you two should seek medical attention right away.
Obama: I…uh…me…uh…I….Me
Caroline: Yeah, you know…
Pope: Uhm. (Standing up and leaving) I’ll pray for both of you. And the world.