Former Hitler Youth Targeted?

Five working class men from third world countries have been dragged off the streets of England which they’d been hired to clean and thrown into holding cells on suspicion of allegedly plotting to harm a former member of the infamous Hitler Youth organization.

Pope Benedict XVI, a former Hitler Youth, is the leader of an organization which is one of the only ones that legally continue to harshly discriminate against women. Benedict, who is not expected to draw very large crowds, may allegedly have been the target of these five men of unknown background or religious affiliation.

Pope Benedict, who mysteriously changed his name sometime in the last decade from Josef Ratzinger, has angered many groups with his pronouncements against the peaceful religion of Islam as well as his inflammatory statements against women. Pope Benedict XVI (aka Ratzinger) is most well known for his leadership of a group formerly known as “The Inquisition” which is believed to be responsible for the deaths of thousands if not millions of Europeans some years ago. Benedict is also regarded suspiciously for his infamous coverup of the Roman Catholic Church’s sex abuse scandal which had many in Europe including such luminaries as Christopher Hitchens pleading for his arrest before more children could be hurt.

Thousands of protests were expected to shout down the Pontiff on his visit to Britain but reportedly less than a hundred protestors showed up causing some to believe that the protestors feared retaliation from those who support the Pope or perhaps even Benedict himself,a former Hitler Youth.

The five working class immigrants arrested earlier today may be victims of anti-immigrant fervor in England. In fact, anti-immigrant fervor escalated to such a fever pitch that youths were forced to protest in the streets of France recently.

Coverage will continue.

Note: In case you think this satire is over the top just know that there have been 117 references to Hitler Youth in news stories about the Pope recently. There have been only 43 references to “Muslim terrorist” in stories referring to Pope Benedict.