When asked what religion you are, you say, “I was raised Catholic…”
If you’ve said, “I’m a Catholic but I think for myself…”
You refer in an un-mocking manner to “The Spirit of Vatican II.”
If you’re pro-choice.
If you’re on the NY Times speed dial for their religion stories.
You’re Father Richard McBrien.
You can’t remember if you went to Mass last Christmas.
If upon someone questioning your devotion to your faith you say, “Well what about the priest sexual abuse scandal?”
If you’ve said, “The Church is all about money.”
If you didn’t get the big deal about “The DaVinci Code.”
If you say, “I’m more spiritual than religious…”
If you attend Saint Joan of Arc in Minneapolis.
If you’ve said, “The Church should stay out of my bedroom!”
If you call Jesus “a great philosopher.”
If you think the overriding message of the gospels is “Judge not lest ye be judged.”
If you think the puppet gave a good sermon.
If you believe the frump in the moo-moo has a valid ordination.
If you’re an Obamaniac.
If you believe we haven’t had a Pope since 1958.
If your name is Bishop Williamson.
If your house was on fire and you’d save your Marty Haugen’s Greatest Hits Volume II CD.
June 27, 2008 at 9:51 pm
…If you are the parish DRE and never heard of the word “transubstantiation.”
[yes, until recently that was the situation at my parish, but to be a little charitable maybe she’s not liberal, but rather uneducated]
June 27, 2008 at 10:17 pm
You might not be a Catholic if you’re a DRE and have went broke shopping at Michaels
June 28, 2008 at 12:16 am
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
June 28, 2008 at 2:16 am
Note: The humorless, the holier than thou, and the rude will be deleted as a matter of course.
Please return to your regularly scheduled programming.
June 28, 2008 at 4:39 am
Patrick and Matthew,
“Note: The humorless, the holier than thou, and the rude will be deleted as a matter of course.”
Thanks a lot. I’ll have you know I have an excellent sense of humor. You guys are rarely funny.
I can take a joke guys, but I think you both know you go to far on occasions. It’s not a big deal. Who doesn’t go to far from time to time? But to keep deleting my comments in order to silence a word of warning to the wise (that’s you guys) is ridiculous. I expected a more noble and tactful response from the Archbold brothers. God bless and keep you…
~cmpt
June 28, 2008 at 5:34 am
Mr. T
Had you an email address on your name, I would have sent you an email response. Since however you chose to address this in public I will address it briefly.
You wrote :”I’ll have you know I have an excellent sense of humor.”
Objection! Assuming facts not in evidence.
When you criticize us for jeopardizing souls because of a silly joke post that says “You might not be a catholic…” it fails to qualify as mere hyperbole but rather just as humorless and rude. You are certainly entitled to your opinion, and we look forward [not really] to reading it on your blog some day. As long as this is our blog, we make the call.
Plus, we didn’t want your comments to ruin the mood. We were having fun and you seemed determined to spoil it. Please stick around, but chill.
p.s. I deleted your comment, not Matthew. I have deleted only a handful during the past year, but yours seemed particularly unprofitable.
June 28, 2008 at 8:44 am
Patrick,
I did include an e-mail address in my first post, but something happened to it… Oh yeah: you were censoring readers concerning about the moral quality of your posts.
Hey, I am not asking you to change who you are or what you do with your blog. I am merely asking that you watch the line between good fun and slander. That is all.
~cmpt
July 2, 2008 at 9:34 am
You might not be Catholic if…you can’t figure out the difference between a Hail Mary pass, and immaculate reception and the Immaculate Conception.