As all our regular readers know, I am a huge fan of Pope Benedict the XVI. The Pope has shown his brilliance and orthodoxy more times than we can count. His thoughts on liturgy, the Eucharist, love, and charity are justifiably lauded.
I must, however, admit that I have harbored some doubts about the Pope’s judgment in certain substantial matters. I have noticed this repeated lapse in judgment exercised by the Pope in his personal life but have said nothing due to my abundant respect for the man and the office he holds. But a news story I read today no longer allows me to hold my tongue.
How can a man, so brilliant and discerning in so many ways, be a cat lover?
[Inquirer.net]SYDNEY—Cat-loving Pope Benedict XVI has been given a kitten to keep him company while he relaxes and plays the piano ahead of World Youth Day in Australia, Church insiders told Agence France Presse on Monday.
The Pontiff, an avid feline fan whose home in Germany is filled with the animals and is guarded by a cat statue, has been given an 11-month-old tabby named Bella by his followers.
Everybody with half a brain knows that cats are evil. They are lazy, self centered, and devious. I have a theory that cats are the only creatures not directly created by God. I suspect, but cannot yet prove, that cats entered into this realm through some inter-dimensional Nazi experiment that went awry opening a portal to hell. I have also heard that the furry lil’ demons can steal your breath. Look it up! It’s on the interweb thingy!
How can the pontiff not see they evil right in front of him? I think that what is wrong with cats can be summed up well in the classic joke:
How Dogs and Cats view their masters
A dog says, ‘You pet me, you feed me, you shelter me, you love me, you must be God.’
A cat says, ‘You pet me, you feed me, you shelter me, you love me, I must be God.’
But this is no laughing matter. The Bible tells us the actions of the Antichrist.
“He will oppose and will exalt himself over everything that is called God or is worshiped, so that he sets himself up in God’s temple, proclaiming himself to be God.” – 2 Thessalonians 2:4
It is very clear that if cats are not the actual Antichrist, they are clearly in league with him. I, for one, am very thankful for the limits of Papal infallibility.
July 15, 2008 at 6:56 am
Everybody knows that cats are the superior species.
July 15, 2008 at 8:52 am
There is something strangely… familiar about cats, something which is… sin-uous, far from purrfic.
July 15, 2008 at 1:04 pm
At first, I admit I thought that you had gone off the deep end. However, after realizing the joke of it all – it is awesome, and actually quite factual. Cats are sneaky and devious. My best friend has a couple and they are forever knocking over her things and breaking them. I love her immensely – her cats – not so much. Awesome article.
July 15, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Oh. You must a ‘dog’ person.
(lol I have both and if you want unconditional love, get a dog. If you want a mature 2-way relationship, get a cat.)
July 15, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Cats aren’t so bad; they go well with habanera sauce and a nice white or blush.
— Mack
July 15, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Maybe Pope Benedict is trying to convert it. There is precedent for hellish creatures being redeemed -see Hellboy.
July 15, 2008 at 2:08 pm
Matt – AND Hellboy apparently loves kitties.
Patrick, didn’t you see the news about the mother cat in the Netherlands that took in a red panda cub that was rejected by its own mother? “For I was hungry and you fed me…”
July 15, 2008 at 2:12 pm
There are entirely too many cat apologists on here. Cats were worshipped by the Egyptians. They are pagan gods. They HAVE mouths, but they do not speak!
July 15, 2008 at 3:02 pm
Utter rubbish. The Holy Father’s tabby is yet another aspect of the New Evangelization, and is being used constructively to that end.
As we Christians know, “ALL things work together for good for those who love God,” – even cats.
BTW, if you want two Great Danes I’m willing to let mine go at a moment’s notice for a nominal fee. I’ve had enough of their tails swatting my kids in the face and making them cry. Now THAT’S evil…
God Bless,
Ryan
July 15, 2008 at 3:11 pm
The other saying goes: ‘Dogs have masters; cats have staff.’
July 15, 2008 at 3:22 pm
OK, this is very funny (yawn) but many innocent animals have suffered because some people really do believe or like to pretend that cats are familiars of the devil and so forth. That is utter bosh, as you know, but people really do steal and brutalize cats, partly because they have that reputation. Oh, yeah, I LOVE MY KITTIES. If you must know, they are marvelous and affectionate creatures. So there. Kit.
July 15, 2008 at 3:48 pm
A cat says, ‘…you love me, I must be God.’
By analogy. Cats are an icon of mystery; they are given us by God — and are cherished by those who have eyes to see — as reminders that it’s possible to embrace a Mystery we can neither understand nor control.
Romulus
July 15, 2008 at 3:53 pm
If cats are so “evil,” then why does a three-headed dog guard the entrance to hell (well, at least in some traditions)?
July 15, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Patrick,
I hear that the original name of the tabby was ‘Legion’.
Makes sense now after reading your posting.
July 15, 2008 at 7:51 pm
Everything you’ve written is true, EVERYTHING! Lord help us all.
Gotta go, the wife’s two cats just entered the room! I think they’re on to me!
July 15, 2008 at 8:19 pm
As the old joke goes, “Dogs come when you call them, cats take a message and get back to you!”
Mind you, I wouldn’t swap one of my 3 minous for anything — and I love dogs too!
Thanks for the laugh — and yes, they DO sleep a lot, lazy critters!
July 15, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Cats are worthless – unless you have a rodent problem.
July 16, 2008 at 7:04 am
Sir Winston Churchill said: “Dogs look up to us, cats look down on us and pigs treat us as equals.
July 16, 2008 at 2:20 pm
My cat has already done something that multiple mouse traps haven’t: caught two mice.
July 16, 2008 at 7:51 pm
No, no, no! Don’t you people get it? Can’t you see the obvious? The ancient Egyptians worshipped the Cat-goddess “Bastet”. In the spirit of eccumenism, the Pope is OBVIOUSLY trying to reach out to all the followers of ancient Egyptian paganism within Catholicism (most of them located in San Francisco, CA).