A clash between Armenian and Greek Orthodox monks broke out in the Church of the Holy Sepulcher, revered as the site of Jesus’ crucifixion, burial and resurrection. These guys fight all the time but this time there’s video.
Now, this is technically a brawl but I’ve seen better fighting in the Celebrity Boxing Match between Todd Bridges and Vanilla Ice. There’s pushing and there’s punches thrown and there’s a little bleeding but if these guys are going to continue brawling they really should prepare a little. I’ve seen more ruthless fighting in my community theater’s “adaptation” of West Side Story. (What? My wife likes musicals!)
So here’s the recipe for brawling monks: Start with an Armenian procession. Add a large dose of objecting Greeks. Mix them together. Strenuously.
Police arrested two monks, one from each side, probably because arresting one side and not the other would have caused another brawl.
So, in the end, my prescription for these guys is either brawl a lot more so it’s not so embarrassing or just give up brawling altogether and maybe pray a little more for patience with each other and remember where you are. Just a suggestion. I don’t want to start a fight or nothing.
November 10, 2008 at 5:14 am
Kinda like the brawl scene at the conclusion of Blazing Saddles .
But without cowboys.
Or effeminate male dancers.
But other than that, yeah, it looks just like it!
November 10, 2008 at 12:18 pm
The fighting spirit of Byzantium lives! Almost.
— Mack
November 10, 2008 at 1:58 pm
Boys will be boys
November 10, 2008 at 4:25 pm
When I was in Jerusalem, I met some VERY holy people, and others who were so dower and hostile that it was almost disheartening. I found the Greek, Russian and Syriac clergy there to be the most hostile, cutting their eyes at anyone who would dare to encroach on their turf. It was almost as if that was their “calling”: to protect their church’s turf. This is why the church of the Holy Sepulchre isn’t really so much a church as an unconfederation of chapels.
November 10, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Blazing Saddles?!! May I paraphrase?
“You can’t come in here, this is a closed Church!”
“Piss on you, I’m working for Bene 16!”
[PUNCH]
November 10, 2008 at 7:03 pm
These monks need to rent some old Run Run Shaw type kungfu flicks featuring real buttwhipping monks. They could use them as training films for their next fight.
November 11, 2008 at 2:08 am
No wonder Muslims retain the keys to the Church of the Holy Sepulchure.
November 11, 2008 at 5:51 pm
Chris, that is actually part of the reason. The biggest reason is that the Israeli government is all about the “status quo” with regards to anything pertaining to non-Jewish religion in Israel. Meaning, anything that was the case on the day Israel became a nation is basically retained. This is why it is next to impossible to get any repairs, renovations or building permits for churches.
One night I stayed in a group inside the Holy Sepulchre when the Israeli Defense Force came in and started bruskly herding people towards the exit (this happens every night). Once we were all huddled outside, the Mohammedans came (six of them) into the courtyard. The monks closed the door from the inside, then the Mohammedan came up and locked the door from the outside, and about 10 or so Western vistors started cheering and clapping as if they had just watched the end of an opera.
I turned to a Franciscan friar and said, “why can’t we stop this practice? We don’t need Mohammedans to hold the keys to our holiest place.” He shrugged and said, “it’s the status quo. It’s the way “they” want it.”