There is a very strange report that Vladimir Putin is, of all things, an ABBA fan.

Rumor has it that he attended a concert put on by the ABBA tribute band Bjorn Again. So I puzzled over what might interest a budding Czar in such pop pulp? The it occurred to me that perhaps Putin, since he is not a native English speaker, might not have all the lyrics straight. CMR’s inside source, present at the concert, overheard the Prime Minister singing some different lyrics to some of the well known diddies.

Mamma Mia (lyrics by V. Putin)

I’ve been cheated by you since I don’t know when
So I made up my mind, it must come to an end
Look at me now, will I ever learn?
I don’t know how but I suddenly lose control
Look in my eyes and see my soul
Just one look and I can hear a bell ring
One more look and I forget everything, w-o-o-o-oh

KGBya, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
KGBya, does it show again?
My my, just how much I’ve missed you
Yes, I’ve been brokenhearted
Blue since the day we parted
Why, why did I ever let you go?
KGBya, now I really know,
My my, I could never let you go.

And of course this ABBA classic:

Dancing Queen (lyrics by Czar Vladimir I)

You can’t run, you can’t hide, ending the time of your life
Flags unfurl, watch that scene, I am the King of mean

At the KGB and the lights are low
Army looking for a place to go
Just like the cossacks, empire is the thing
The time has come for a Russian king
Medvedev is not that guy
Oppose my plan and you have to die
Georgia is toast yeah, Ukraine’s next
Soviets in the mood for advance
And when I get the chance…

I am the King of mean, feel the heat, into smithereens
King of mean, taste defeat, like a time machine
You can’t run, you can’t hide, ending the time of your life
Flags unfurl, watch that scene, I am the King of mean