We told you! We told you. This is what gay marriage leads to. And now it’s happened. You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! Damn you all!
An infant boy was married off to his neighbors’ dog in eastern India by villagers, who said it will stop the groom from being killed by wild animals, officials and witnesses said on Wednesday.
Around 150 tribespeople performed the ritual recently in a hamlet in the state of Orissa’s Jajpur district after the boy, who is under two years old, grew a tooth on his upper gum.
The Munda tribe see such a growth in young children as a bad omen and believe it makes them prone to attacks by tigers and other animals. The tribal god will bless the child and ward off evil spirits after the marriage.
February 19, 2009 at 12:04 pm
I think I should say something about this, but I really am quite speechless.
February 19, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Finally, we got Larry to be silent. This whole blog was worth it then.
February 19, 2009 at 12:27 pm
I understand you are trying to be humourous here, but it doesn’t work. Pagan India has a LOT of evil at work there. Child sacrifice, temple prostitutes and wife emolation are still very much practice. Orissa Hindus have been especially cruel to Christians, raping and murdering nuns and hacking priests to pieces. And in this case, an infant child being “married” to dog doesn’t really make me laugh, no matter how you try and spin this.
But on a lighter note, I think you owe me royalties on the “Planet of the Apes” quote, since I was the first one to use it on your blog : )
February 19, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Am I supposed to experience a moment of multicultural appreciation here?
Thank God I’m Christian.
February 19, 2009 at 2:32 pm
after the boy, who is under two years old, grew a tooth on his upper gum.
I’m confused…they consider teething an evil omen?
I’m with Eo Nomine – I’m glad I’m Christian.
February 19, 2009 at 3:35 pm
Eo Nomine and Christina, we are all SO blessed to be Christian. It is such a gift and we are so unworthy of it. If the worst thing to happen to this poor boy being brought up amongst the pagans of India is this “marriage”, then he will be lucky as well. Unfortunately, this is most likely the begining of a very sad and miserable life for him.
February 19, 2009 at 3:53 pm
At the risk of sounding like I condone this sort of thing, these stories show up pretty regularly from India; I think last year I read about a woman who was married to a tree in order to lift some sort of curse. By “marrying” the animal, tree, shrub, or whatever, kinship is established with its kind, and thus the person will be safe from harm or avoid. Such “marriages” are essentially symbolic, and do not prevent the person from having a normal human marriage. I doubt that there is any sexual component to them. Because all of this is located within a particular magico-religious context, I don’t think there is any comparison with western marital deviations that are more of an expression of cultural decadence and moral decline, like the woman who “married” a dolphin, and, of course, gay marriage. This is just superstition plain and simple.
February 19, 2009 at 5:51 pm
David – your point is absolutely well-taken. And yes, this is superstition. But I would not downplay it at all. India’s pagan superstitions as I mentioned also can involve sexual contact (see: gang rape), temple prostitution/servitude, and even child sacrifice. So, “superstition” can be deadly in the spiritual and physical sense.
February 20, 2009 at 12:03 am
Well, look on the bright side folks… at least we know there will never be marital stife due to arguing over who left the toilet seat up…
February 20, 2009 at 11:33 am
And I thought my wife was a…nevermind.