Things are really starting to take shape in the contest to find the person who exerting the worst influence on our culture. Some of the bubble players and teams have fallen by the wayside as the people with a proven track record show why they are the favorites. Here are your Creep Sixteen.
Some big surprises advanced to the Creep 16 in the only tournament that really matters.
Pelosi over OctoMom – The eyes have it. Pelosi looked surprised that she won and flew out on an Air Force Jet. Hey, in the end no matter how messed up she might be OctoMom gave life while Pelosi seems hell bent on destroying human life.
Obama over Soros – Obama wasn’t gonna’ by punished by a billionaire.
Hitchens over Kmiec – Intelligently designed game plan just evolved naturally, said Hitchens.
Chris Matthews over Joe Biden – Biden just had a little too much pride to get down and dirty enough to compete with Matthews, who went after loose balls without dignity.
Bill Maher over Bill Maher – Bill Maher won because he simply had more Playboy Playmate 1990 retreads as cheerleaders and the other Bill Maher got distracted.
Oprah over Al Sharpton – Al thinks “its a outrage” that he lost. But pound for pound Oprah is simply capable of more damage. Al’s bullhorn just wasn’t big enough.
Robert Byrd over Janet Jackson – Did you really think the former Klan member would let “one of her kind” win?
Dan Brown over Barney Frank – Frank just spreads lies about Republicans while Dan Brown lies about Jesus. He wins.
ACLU over Jar Jar Binks – Jar Jar was content to screw up a galaxy far far away. The ACLU is screwing up this one.
Hillary Clinton over Peter Singer – Peter Singer came up with great theories on how to advance evil in Western Civilization but Hillary puts them into practice. Every day.
Arlen Specter over Spears – It came down to one last play. Spears who reinvented herself and made yet another comeback was on defense. Specter had the ball. It was just a question of whether he’s go left or right. Spears guessed right but Specter did the non primary year shuffle and only faked right and drove left. Sadly, if this were an election year Spears likely would’ve been right.
Alec Baldwin over Bill O’Reilly – Both loudmouth blowhards but CMR gets the feeling that Baldwin really believes it.
Ron Howard over Michael Steele – Howard gets the victory just for gumption because he’s attacking a 2,000 year old institution while Steele is simply presiding over the destruction of the Republican Party which has only been around for 150 years.
Vox Nova over Clooney – Hey, at least some people care what Vox Nova says.
VOTF over Donald Trump – In a choice between morally bankrupt and financially bankrupt, morals win out here.
The View over Markos Moloutsis – The View recruits new fresh faces with their lunacy. Kos simply preaches to the converted.
March 18, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Well, apparently my picks are like Leonard’s losers. Whatever I pick, do the opposite. With that said, here are my selections to advance to the elitist eight.
Obama: Might just have the whole package. The elitist education snobbery. The empty rhetoric. A heart darkened enough to see babies as punishment. Pelosi is just another dissenter.
Hitchens: This round doesn’t matter, since either one will be rolled by Obama in the regional finals. At least Hitchens doesn’t believe in God, while Matthews would start convulsing in Obasmic spasms if he ever set foot on the same court as his god.
Oprah over Maher: Very tough call, and could easily go either way. Maher has quite a track record, but for the most part lectures to his class (can’t preach to the choir, since he doesn’t believe in religion). Oprah, on the other hand, has deluded the mainstream to declare herself the mainstream. Maher looks great the whole game and appears to dominate, but Oprah gracefully pulls this one out.
Brown: Wins when he announces his next novel will explore a fictional pope’s enduring secret support for a anti-Semitic dictatorship.
Clinton over ACLU: Still don’t know how she pulled it out over Singer. Waiting to watch it on Tivo.
Specter: Baldwin explanation- “I can’t explain why I kept passing the ball directly to him. It seemed as if he was really on my team.”
Howard: Media coverage suggested a blowout by Vox Nova, but nobody reads the papers anymore, so Opie pulls it out.
The View: Few people can tell the difference between VOTF and the View. VOTF almost wins when they point out they’ve never had anyone nearly as orthodox as Elizabeth Hasselback, but the View prevails when they point out that VOTF also has never had anyone like Rosie O’Donnell.
March 18, 2009 at 12:21 pm
Hmmmm…took a bit of a hit on this one, but looks like my man Barack and his girl, Oprah are holding strong!
Hillary vs. ACLU? That’s a hard one to call…Specter/Baldwin won’t stand a chance, either way!
March 18, 2009 at 12:21 pm
“The eyes have it.”
HA!!!!!!
March 18, 2009 at 12:24 pm
My picks for Elitist 8:
Barack
Mathews
Oprah
Dan Brown
ACLU
Arlen
Ron Howard
The View
March 18, 2009 at 1:44 pm
Oh, for crying out loud!
I lost another $20 because of Bill Mahar!
March 18, 2009 at 1:49 pm
I think I have to recommend Vox Nova win out over Ron Howard. Howard is basically a popcorn movie maker who stumbled without really thinking about it (thinking?!? Ron Howard?) onto an anti-Catholic plot.
However, Vox Nova hit new heights the other day with Gerald L. Campbell, one of their contributors, stating that the American bishops were a bunch of anti-intellectual Lilliputions for opposing same sex marriage.
http://vox-nova.com/2009/03/16/kmiec-on-gay-marriage/#comment-50944
They might lose out to Voice of the Faithful in the following round, but I think Vox Nova deserves one more nod for being the Catholic voice for gay marriage. Way to chip away at the foundations of society.
March 18, 2009 at 1:52 pm
Obama
Hitchens
Oprah
Brown
ACLU
Specter
Howard–WHY IS THAT NOTHING-BURGER VOX NOVA WHICH JUMPED THE SHARK FROM ABOUT DAY TEN STILL IN THIS?!
Anyway,
The View over VOTF. Again, like Vox Nova, VOTF’s goose was cooked awhile back.
March 18, 2009 at 2:00 pm
My picks: Obama, Hitchens, Oprah, Byrd, ACLU, Spector, Vox Nova, The View
March 18, 2009 at 3:07 pm
Come on Oprah! Go Oprah, go, go Oprah, go! Woooohoooo!
She gives away money: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_AXaDIKBDQ4&feature=PlayList&p=672F556E5AE3867C&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=3
Dot was on Oprah: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6BHJGx-UCw&feature=PlayList&p=EB81760EFFB0B081&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=35
Oprah's fav 5: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrAMPYEczK0&feature=PlayList&p=672F556E5AE3867C&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=1
Oprah deals with severe traumas: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XogGaDkroB0&feature=PlayList&p=672F556E5AE3867C&index=2&playnext=2&playnext_from=PL
Oprah's bookclub: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOAXiZZKoqI
She appears on Dr. Phil: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LD8SqchF_3o&feature=related
March 18, 2009 at 4:54 pm
I disagree about the Kmiec/Hitchens results. Kmiec BY FAR is more dangerous than a bumbling drunkard who’s at least right on half the issues.
So far, round two has me with only one loss (only two losses after two rounds… not bad).
Okay, my Elite Eight:
ACLU vs. Arlen
Ron Howard vs. The View
Oprah vs. Dan Brown
Barack vs. …… hmmm…. since Kmiec is gone, I’ll have to go with Hitchens. Nobody takes Matthews’ game seriously anymore.
My Final Four will be:
ACLU (The Legal Wolfpack) vs. The View (The Chattering Estrogens)
Oprah (The Harpies) vs. Barack (The Obamessiah)
Championship Game:
ACLU vs. The Obamessiah
Winner:
ACLU… when we all finally realize that The One was just an empty suit.
March 18, 2009 at 4:56 pm
obama, hitchens, maher, brown, Clinton, specter, vox nova, the view
March 18, 2009 at 10:44 pm
My Picks –
Obama
Matthews
Maher
Byrd
ACLU
Baldwin
Howard
VOTF
March 18, 2009 at 10:52 pm
Come on Nancy! You can do it! Only 4 more pretenders to beat down before you become Queen Heretic.
Damien
March 19, 2009 at 3:14 pm
Sorry for coming so late to the game. This is hilarious. My picks for the Elite 8:
Obama
Hitchens
Oprah
Byrd
ACLU
Specter
Vox Nova
VOTF
The most insidious attacks on our culture come from those who claim to be one thing (e.g., Catholic) and regularly espouse views opposed to what they proclaim to be (e.g., Pelosi, Biden, Vox Nova, etc.). The immediate effects on culture are not apparent, but are felt after generations of mis-education and deceit.
(A special “hello” to D Mac from a former fellow novice.)
March 20, 2009 at 6:39 pm
I never thought of myself as sexist, but I can easily see Oprah, Hillary, Speaker Pelosi, and the gals of The View in the Final Four.