Levi Johnston is swamped. His busy schedule is filled with dishing the dirt on the Palins’ to any microphone or camera but he just announced “he’s open” to cramming any acting or modeling gigs into his busy schedule. Oh. What a surprise.
But in the interest of helping, the CMR Casting Agency is hard at work dreaming up good roles for him:
1) A buddy cop movie with Screech.
2) Red Shirted crew member in an upcoming Star Trek sequel.
3) Joran Van Der Sloot in the Natalee Holloway story.
4) Anthony Michael Hall’s role as Winona Ryder’s controlling boyfriend in an off-off Broadway musical production of “Edward Scissorhands.”
5) Starring in “Joe Biden – The Early Years.”
6) Any remake of an 80’s movie with James Spader where he played a jerk. “Less than Zero” or “Pretty in Pink.” Either one.
7) Someone in the next Rambo movie who says, “This Rambo guy ain’t so bad. I’ll take him out.”
8) The guy in any horror movie who says, “What’s that noise in the basement, you guys continue playing Dungeons and Dragons I’m going to check this out.
9) Playing Ted McGinley’s character’s son in a straight-to-Beta Revenge of the Nerds 2010.
10) Any role in a Beverly Hillbillies remake.
If you’d like to help Levi find some work in Hollywood, please feel free to offer suggestions for roles.
April 9, 2009 at 9:22 pm
First a little reality TV. Maybe the Real World. Or the guy that everyone hates on The Apprentice.
April 9, 2009 at 9:24 pm
Alien – digitally replace every shot of Paul Reiser with Levi Johnson. Win-win!
April 9, 2009 at 9:52 pm
You guys rock my world.
How about Sylar’s next victim?
Or any role where he gets beat to crap by a chic.
April 9, 2009 at 11:12 pm
There are always disaster movies.
He could star as the young scientist full of his own agendas and theories only to see them squashed by the hurricane/tornado/tidal wave/volcano/blizzard or whatever the global warming crisis Hollywood wants to throw at us.
Those are full of cheesy drama.
April 9, 2009 at 11:29 pm
Neah, I say have him be the sacrifice in Joe versus the Volcano Part II
April 10, 2009 at 12:46 am
Give me an example of a James Spader movie where he didn’t play a jerk.
April 10, 2009 at 2:47 am
The sequel to the Golden Compass – it might not get made, and even if it does, it’s not like anyone will actually watch it.
April 10, 2009 at 2:59 am
That little boy better stay south of the 49th; I think Mr. Palin would whip his sorry *ss if he could get hold of him.
April 10, 2009 at 4:50 am
Let’s see where James Spader was not a jerk…”True Colors” and “Stargate” come to mind.
April 14, 2009 at 8:51 pm
Third hillbilly on the left for the remake of “Deliverance”.