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Three Words

Zombie ——Fire——-Ants

Nothing – and I mean nothing – says apocalypse like a plague of Zombie Fire Ants.

McClatchy reports that “Parasitic flies turn fire ants into zombies”

The flies “dive-bomb” the fire ants and lay eggs. The maggot that hatches inside the ant eats away at the brain, and the ant starts exhibiting what some might say is zombie-like behavior.

“At some point, the ant gets up and starts wandering,” said Rob Plowes, a research associate at UT.

The maggot eventually migrates into the ant’s head, but Plowes said he “wouldn’t use the word ‘control’ to describe what is happening. There is no brain left in the ant, and the ant just starts wandering aimlessly. This wandering stage goes on for about two weeks.”

Once this has been proven, it is only a matter of time until somebody gets the bright idea to try it on humans.

If zombie ants aren’t bad enough, how about…

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Plague of Tarantulas!!!!!

If swarms of zombie fire ants didn’t convince you that we are on the brink of destruction, this should.

[TimesOnline]Australia is known around the world for its large and deadly creepy crawlies, but even locals have been shocked by the size of the giant venomous spiders that have invaded an Outback town in Queensland.

Scores of eastern tarantulas, which are known as “bird-eating spiders” and can grow larger than the palm of a man’s hand, have begun crawling out from gardens and venturing into public spaces

Pharoah should be letting Israel go any time now.

So if a swarm of giant creepy spiders doesn’t convince you, how ’bout a swarm of …

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Lunar Robotic Spiders

For this stupidity we can thank the Italians.

The idea to compete for the Google Lunar X Prize crystallized around the vision of Alberto Rovetta, a professor of robot mechanics at Politecnico di Milano.

Rovetta’s designs for lunar robots resemble skittering spiders or crabs that could deploy as a swarm of mobile cameras and sensors on both legs and wheels.

Swarms of robotic spiders roaming the lunar landscape. After this, there will be no convincing friendly aliens that we mean them no harm.

If this isn’t creepy enough, I will give you creepy.

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Watch This If You Dare!
I dare you not to hide under your bed after watching that!

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When Urban Legends Attack

Men, you may want to skip this one. You may never enjoy a siesta in the bathroom again. We can only tell you this story, mercifully there are no pictures.

Reuters reports that a Taiwanese man became a sitting target for a snake, which bit his penis as sat on the toilet at his rural home, local media reported on Monday.
“As soon as he sat down, he suddenly felt a knife-like pain and reacted instinctively by standing up,” the China Times said. “When he looked down, he saw the big snake.”

“When he looked down, he saw the big snake.” Yeah, moving along…

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Zombies Gotta Make a Living Too!

Are ad agencies so bereft of original ideas that they have resorted to re-animating the dead? Ahem, zombies don’t stop at popcorn. Brains! They eat brains!

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This Guy!

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Speaking Of Bizarre Creatures!

Pravda reports that “weird creatures” were found in a trench in Russia. Some call them living fossils or cross breeds of something and another thing. We don’t listen to crazy talk though. These things are not naturally occurring. No wonder Russia is willing to talk nuclear detente with us because they’ve already invented these bioengineered baby beasts from Hell. They don’t need the nukes.

We are so doomed!

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If you’d like to add any signs of the apocalypse you are encouraged to write them in the combox. Eventually, one of you will be right.

Posted by Patrick & Matthew Archbold