A Phillipine Senator has written a letter to her Bishop asking not to be excommunicated for her support of a “contraceptive bill.”

I don’t know if the Bishop should excommunicate her for supporting the bill, but he should probably do it over the letter. It is kind of like asking the principal not expel you for foul language by writing a letter that says “Please don’t @#$%! expel me!”

In a Friday letter to Bishop Nereo Odchimar, president of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of the Philippines (CBCP), Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago defended the proposed legislation as a way to “liberate the poor from social, political, and economic oppression.

“If I were to be excommunicated, I would be expelled from the Church, more particularly from the Eucharist. I would thus be placed in the same category as those guilty of so-called serious sins, such as apostasy, murder, heresy, and adultery. [There is a reason for that.] I plead that I am not guilty of mortal sin,” [I swear officer, that guy stepped right in front of my bullet.] her letter continued, according to ABS-CBN News.

Citing Church teaching that mortal sin is “a fundamental rejection of God and a reorientation of one’s whole life away from all that is good and just,” Sen. Defensor-Santiago described herself as “a strong advocate of social justice, particularly the anti-corruption crusade.” [So I am against corruption, everything else is negotiable]

The senator said she had been taught to implement “liberation theology,” which in her view means that believers achieve salvation by liberating the poor from oppression. [Yawn]

“This is what I am trying to do with my bill,” she added.

She stated “respectfully” that the penalty of excommunication for bill supporters would be “too extreme and disproportionate” and will raise constitutional issues about the church-state relationship. [Is that a threat?]

The senator also challenged Catholic teaching on contraception reiterated in Pope Paul VI’s 1968 encyclical “Humane Vitae.”

“I am humbly but morally convinced that the arguments for contraception are superior,” she said. [Gotcha, adios!]

Her letter repeated many common objections of those who dissent from “Humanae Vitae.” She cited disagreement on the commission which advised Pope Paul VI and claimed opponents of the Philippines bill “fail to recognize the evolutionary character of Church teaching.” She also said that natural law theory is “already obsolete.” [Church teaching has to evolve. I mean its not like Jesus, living 2000 years ago if he lived at all, could have foreseen our challenges today. Its not like he is God or something. I mean, Jesus, get with the times already!]

Defensor-Santiago also cited the Second Vatican Council’s Declaration on Religious Freedom, which says no one should be forced to act “in a manner contrary to one’s conscience” or should be restrained from acting in accord with one’s conscience.

Natural law obsolete. The arguments for contraception are ‘superior.’ Liberation theology.

If nothing else, she should be excommunicated for being boring. Then again, I suppose there is no such thing as an original heretic.

So tell me now. Who here finds the tactic “I will shoot one hostage every hour until I am acquitted of these ridiculous murder charges,” to be an effective argument?