You’ve dreamed about it. A rocket launcher made of bacon. Yup. You read it right. A rocket launcher made of bacon. But wait. That’s not all. It shoots sausage links!!!!!!!!!!
I think I dreamed about this once. (But it was in a different context and I was in prison in the dream.)
I’ll have to call my priest and see if this is OK to fire on Fridays during Lent.
April 15, 2011 at 8:39 pm
the cheap-o in me says that a potato gun is a better buy
April 15, 2011 at 8:46 pm
There is an anti-jihad joke in there somewhere…
April 15, 2011 at 8:48 pm
ha!!
April 15, 2011 at 9:11 pm
They sell ball point pens in Israel that contain dried pigs blood in them with the thought that no Jihadist would want to die near a person who may be carrying pig's blood, lest the suicide bomber's blood get mixed in – in which case the bomber would go to hell instead of heaven. Supposedly.
But how is the bomber supposed to see a ball point pen and be deterred? I think this bacon rocket is a much better idea.
Better yet – how about a clothing line made of bacon. Perfect for your local Israeli bus stop. Jews should be able to wear it – so long as they don't eat it. I think.
Then again, somewhere in the Koran is actually suggests that pigs ARE Jews. (Nice.) (This may be the only reason the Jihadists don't eat them as well.)
April 15, 2011 at 9:35 pm
If polyester is made from petro-chemicals, surely we can come up with a fiber made from bacon grease. The only problem might be that it would be dangerous for mailmen to wear.
April 15, 2011 at 9:38 pm
@anon:The Koran states a lot of assinine thoughts. There's even one about the livestock of Muslims being also Muslim. The video shows the citation and the justification for doing this. http://divine-ripples.blogspot.com/2011/04/will-peta-stop-muslims-from-having-pets.html
April 15, 2011 at 9:40 pm
I'm getting one.
April 15, 2011 at 9:42 pm
I think a spud cannon is allowed on Fridays during Lent. I suspect a bacon bazooka is a bad idea ANY day of the week.
I'm just sayin'.
April 16, 2011 at 4:56 am
I just want to eat it. Is that wrong? But not on Fridays. Another day.
April 16, 2011 at 11:26 am
It's a little perverse to use food like this while there are still so many hungry people in the world. I was taught to eat everything I put on my plate so that no food is wasted. When I see things like this or food fights, it's a little disgusting.
Of course, this doesn't mean I don't enjoy Matthew's other posts, especially his family humor stories.
April 18, 2011 at 6:00 pm
Hey Toma – who says they're not going to eat it afterwards? Maybe some hungry kid's mouth is at the other end.
No one every said you can't play with your food first. (Well, except my Mom.)