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Baby vs. Baby

What is the world coming to?

I don’t care what anybody says, that baby in lane 4 is clearly juicing.

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Man on Man?

The word ‘Gaydar’ has officially been added to Oxford English Dictionary.
It’s defined as a:

noun (informal) a homosexual person’s ability to identify another person as homosexual by interpreting subtle signals conveyed by their appearance, interests, etc.

Ha. That’s the first time I’ve seen the word subtle and homosexual in the same sentence in a decade.

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Woman vs. Common Sense?

Coffee. Coffee. I really like Coffee. I Love Coffee. I love Coffee Cups. Did I mention I like Coffee? Any want to go to the prom with me and have some Coffee. I love coffee…

One dress, Tall or Vente?

According to the school district website:

Aimee Kick, a senior at Francis Howell North High School, knew she wanted to wear a dress that would not only be elegant and fashionable, but one-of-a-kind at her senior prom. Aimee spends a lot of time at coffee shops in her spare time and has become known as the “the girl with a coffee cup,” which was the inspiration for her dress.”

I wonder what happens if it rains? Anyway, I feel sorry for her date. You always ordered light and sweet but once you drive away you realize that you got stuck with black and bitter.

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Robot vs. Man

Oh yeah, these trilobots look all cute but they’re the beginning of the end of the human race. Back in the good old days, there was always the hope that after the robot revolution, eventually they’d run out of batteries. But noooooooooo! One inventor had to go and invent a solar powered robot. Thanks. Thanks a lot. My only word of advice to future resistance fighters is we attack at night.

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Man vs … Um Woman vs… Oh. You Figure It Out!

If this isn’t offensive… Reuters:Court frees cross-dressing flashing “nuns”

Seventeen British men stood trial dressed in nun’s habits on the Greek island of Crete on Monday for flashing their bottoms in public, but walked free after no one showed up to testify their behavior was offensive.

Police said they had arrested the 17 men, aged between 18 and 65, early on Sunday at the popular resort of Malia and a prosecutor charged them with exposing themselves in public and offending religious symbols.

“They were dressed like nuns, carrying crosses, but wearing thongs under their skirts and showing people their bottoms and the rest,” said a police official who declined to be named.

Apprehended in the early hours of Sunday, the men were taken into custody and appeared in court on Monday in the same clothes they were wearing at the time of their arrest.

So let me get this straight. You had 65 year old men exposing their rears and nobody found that offensive? My gaydar is going off. Big time.

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Man Vs. Operator

According to news reports a 62 year old man was lost in the woods and emergency responders were searching for him overnight. The Sherriff had an idea.

Williams said he attempted to use the man’s cell phone signal to locate him, but the man was behind on his phone bill and the Verizon operator refused to connect the signal unless the sheriff’s department agreed to pay the overdue bill. After some disagreement, Williams agreed to pay $20 on the phone bill in order to find the man. But deputies discovered the man just as Williams was preparing to make arrangements for the payment.

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This Guy!

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Man vs. Oh I Give Up
Flushing out the Murderer

According to News of the Weird:

In April, the district attorney in Vilas County, Wis., announced that he was seeking volunteers for a forensic test to help his case against Douglas Plude, 42, who is scheduled to stand trial soon for the second time in the death of his wife. The volunteers must be female, about 5-feet-8 and 140 pounds, and will have to stick their heads into a toilet bowl and flush. Plude is charged with drowning his wife in a commode, but his version (which the prosecutor will try to show is improbable) is that his wife committed suicide by flushing herself.

Seems like a good idea right about now.

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Posted by Patrick & Matthew Archbold