In a country of absolutely bonkers lawsuits this has to be one of the bonkiest. The Grio reports:

A Portland pimp is suing Nike for not placing a warning label in their shoes specifying that they could be used as a dangerous weapon — after he was sentenced to 100 years in prison for brutally beating a john with his sneaker.

Sirgiorgiro Clardy, 26, claims Nike should have placed a warning in the shoes warning consumers that the kicks have the potential to be used as a dangerous weapon, according to The Oregonian newspaper. Clardy is seeking $100 million for what he believes was the shoe manufacturer’s oversight.

In June, Clardy repeatedly stomped on the face of a client with his Jordan Nike shoes when the man refused to pay Clardy’s prostitute. The man required stitches and plastic surgery after the beating.

‘Cause remember, in America, it’s always someone else’s fault.

*subhead*Litigious.*subhead*