So for a moment I thought maybe the WNBA did something interesting. The WNBA Players Association stood up for bodily autonomy and against the mandatory vaccines, I thought. Sadly, my hopes were dashed once again on Twitter, the place where all hopes go to get dashed.

Because nothing gets me more in the mood to watch mediocre basketball than talk about baby killing. How about you?

Just hours before the WNBA’s championship game that would end the entire season, The WNBA Players Association decided to publish an editorial in the New York Times speaking out against Texas’ six-week abortion ban. 

“Reproductive rights are human rights. Family planning is freedom,” the statement reads in large letters. It comes days after the state’s near-total abortion ban was put back into place following a temporary emergency stay by the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 5th Circuit. 

So, to be clear, the day before perhaps the championship game these women are thinking about…politics? What? So if they even think politics is more exciting than their being in the championship game, I guess I’ll agree with them.

The funny thing is that right now at this very moment basketball players are losing their jobs over the issue of bodily autonomy and these players are silent about it. Or maybe their silence tells us all we need to know about how hypocritical they are.

I know what they’d say if they actually hired a thinking consultant and had a script prepared for them. They’d say, “Matt is a misogynist who clearly doesn’t understand that the vaccine is totally different than abortion because if he doesn’t take the vaxx then that doesn’t just harm him but could actually harm others!!!!”

I’d cleverly respond by saying:

And then I’d probably say something like this just because I’m like that: