Bolt is great. I took four of my gang ages 3-9 and they all loved it. I, who am 40, loved it. If you’re looking for stuff to do over this extended weekend go see this movie. I guarantee you it’s better than all the scatological humor you’ll get from Madagascar II.
I enjoyed it even though for the last half hour of the movie I had to go to the bathroom so badly I was bouncing in my seat. Word of advice -if you’re at the movies with four children-don’t order the large drink. It’s too big. It’s actually ridiculously big but I dove in and finished it somewhere in the second act. So I had to go really really bad but I couldn’t leave the children and I didn’t want to drag them out of the theater thus punishing my children who were smart enough to take measured sips rather than gulping their drinks down like a thirsty castaway. So I bounced. I’m not sure if that helps but I was doing it.
So all that is a long way of saying I feared I was going to explode in the movie and yet I still enjoyed it. Bolt is great but the show is stolen by the way overeager hamster who teams up with Bolt. You’ll love him.
So go see it. I’ll share a quick story with you thus making this the worst movie review ever as it’s more about me than the movie. After the movie we all ran down the aisle towards the exit. My nine year old wanted to stay and listen to the Miley Cyrus song during the closing credits but holy cow…did I mention I had to go. So I escorted them all out by their collars. As we reached the exit, the five year old announced she forgot her jacket. Arggghgh. At this point I was about to ask the three year old if he had any spare pull-ups leftover from the days when he used them. OK. Everyone back into the theater. What color is your jacket that you left in the dark theater?
Black. Great! We first argue about which aisle we were in and then my five year old gets on her hands and knees and begins crawling. ON A MOVIE THEATER FLOOR! I’m surprised she didn’t stick to it like flypaper. STOP! I say. My six year old finds the jacket under the seat and now we’re racing to the bathroom down the hall.
The girls go into the girl’s room and the three year old boy and I go into the Men’s. I was so proud of him. He “went potty” and then came out of the stall and washed his hands. I was actually thinking to myself how old he was getting until he put his hands under the air dryer and it roared like the Space Shuttle taking off. It was loud. And the boy freaked. He abandoned the hand dryer and ran back into the stall and slammed the door closed. There was a guy standing next to me and he started laughing and I started laughing and all of a sudden the door to the bathroom swings open and there’s a guy standing there and what does he see? Two men giggling like schoolgirls at the urinals and a three year old peaking out from under the stall door. He closed the door without comment. I’m pretty sure he went and called the police. Good for him.
So go see Bolt. Don’t order the big soda. And tell your children to use the handtowels.
November 28, 2008 at 5:31 pm
Hysterical! This would so not happen to a mom. . . ok it would, all except the urinal part.
November 28, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Thanks for this, I am going to Take them to go see this movie tonight, all because of this review!
My Oldest son was very disappointed when he didn’t get to see Madagascar 2 but I’m Sure he will love BOLT!
November 28, 2008 at 6:54 pm
Note to self; keep renting DVDs vice going to the movies. Your bladder will love you for it.
November 28, 2008 at 10:56 pm
I feel your pain, Matthew. I can’t remember which movie I was at, but I recall doing the Bladder Bounce. Ow-chee-wa-wa!
Thanks for the review – might be a family night out this weekend.
November 29, 2008 at 3:11 am
I love your “Dad” posts. You should write a book. God bless you and your family.
November 29, 2008 at 3:23 am
Movies are a father-son gig in our family. My wife enjoys the time to herself. Can you blame her with two boys (8 and 11) all day??
Anyway, we saw Bolt and I couldn’t agree more. It’s a great movie. At our theatre the large drink and gigundo-tub-o-popcorn come with free refills. So, the three of us get just one drink and popcorn and, since my boys are old enough to sit still for a bit, I can go for the refills (rare) if necessary. It’s a whole lot cheaper than getting everyone their own.
November 29, 2008 at 3:43 am
Typically, we bring some Gatorade in with us that we buy before we get to the movie theater but we were very late so we didn’t have time. Needless to say, I would’ve been much better off.
November 30, 2008 at 4:28 pm
I agree, Matthew should write a book. I’d put it on the shelf next to Susie Lloyd’s “Please Don’t Drink the Holy Water.”
December 2, 2008 at 6:43 am
You and your big ol’ drinks…