My wife went out to a shower today. I’m still not even sure if it was a baby shower or a wedding shower. I don’t really ask a lot of questions. All I know is she got dressed up and left me home with the five kids.

It was raining so me, being Super Dad, picked out a large book of nursery rhymes from our bookshelf to read to the four year old. I asked my six year old son if he wanted to listen and he looked at me like I had three or maybe four heads that were each speaking Portuguese in Pig Latin.

OK. I’ll take that as a no. I’m perceptive like that.

I started with Humpty Dumpty, the epic tale of an unfortunate egg. My eight year old daughter, sitting nearby, interrupted by asking “What’s the deal with Humpty Dumpty?”

She asked why, if you were an egg, would you sit on a wall in the first place. Doesn’t that seem like a silly thing for an egg to do? My nine year old daughter added that she wouldn’t sit on a wall and she was human which is a lot more difficult to break than an egg.

The eight year old wondered who puts horses in charge of putting eggs back together anyway. No wonder they couldn’t put him together.

So with my eight and nine year olds in tow I announced that we would look it up on the internet.

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