Cardinal Timothy Dolan seems intent on inviting President Barack Obama to the Al Smith Dinner. So CMR accepts this and simply offers some suggestions for the dinner:
10) Cardinal Dolan should give a speech in advance of the event about how we can all differ about what’s best served at these kinds of events but he would offer assurances of protections for those who want to eat something different. He should say we can all disagree on what’s best on the menu but nobody should be forced to eat something they don’t want to.
9) The Cardinal should then make promises as to what’s going on the menu but then change the menu. A few times. If there are complaints, the Cardinal should simply promise to change the menu at some future date.
8) If President Obama doesn’t like what he’s served, the Cardinal should offer an accomodation meal which is exactly the same meal just served a little while later.
7) Obama needs to eat every darn crumb whether he wants to or not.
6) Wrap all food in latex. Liberals seem to think everything’s better in latex.
5) Have three female Catholic college students hector Obama about how they can’t afford meals and how dangerous it is for women not to eat regularly. So they want his meal right now. And condiments too.
4) Obama can come to the dinner but he must write out all the things he won’t be eating like crisis pregnancy centers have to do.
3) Obama must pay for everyone else’s meal even if he doesn’t like what they’re eating because some people can’t afford a meal.
2) None of the meals may have drinks larger than 16 oz and instead of fries he can get wrapped apple wedges.
1) The Cardinal will speak at the dinner and then when it’s Obama’s turn to speak the Cardinal should say that Obama’s position is “not fair” and then call that dialogue.
If you’d like to add some demands to this list, I’d love to read them.
August 16, 2012 at 5:12 am
Obama must bring drinks to people who have had enough and who are driving, so as not to impede their right to do what they want with their bodies. He not only must refrain from expressing disapproval or from warning them of the dangers of their choices, but must actually facilitate it, or pay for the drink and call someone else over to pour it.
August 16, 2012 at 5:48 am
There is nothing amusing about this abortion loving murderous
president being invited to this dinner.
August 16, 2012 at 6:11 am
@Bree – we laugh to keep from crying – or something.
How the heck could I add anything to this most perfect of requirements?
August 16, 2012 at 11:15 am
Make Obama recite the second paragraph of the Declaration of Independence, the Ninth Amendment and the Tenth of the Constitution, the "WE, the people" part. The list is perfect.
August 16, 2012 at 11:17 am
Oh, and it wouldn't hurt if Obama was forced to say the Pledge of Allegiance and salute the American flag.
August 16, 2012 at 11:40 am
There must be a two-week nationwide prayer campaign that your demands be met. All American Catholics must band together before the Al Smith Dinner to offer up a massive "Fortnight for Foie Gras."
August 16, 2012 at 1:12 pm
Pork loin for dinner. No substitutions. ;>
August 16, 2012 at 1:35 pm
I'm of the opinion that at the beginning of the dinner, or right before Obama is to speak, Cardinal Dolan should announce that as of that moment, the Al Smith Dinner proceeds will all be directed to the overturn of the HHS mandate which is the greatest threat to the Church's ability to help those in need. Dolan ought to remind everyone that no single institution does more to help the poor more than the Catholic Church and that the health care system could not possibly sustain the loss of the Catholic hospital system. Just like Catholic Charities in Massachusetts, the HHS mandate threatens to force Catholic health care institutions to shut down operations. Such a mandate is reprehensible and must be stopped. Then let Obama get up and speak.
August 16, 2012 at 2:14 pm
All other attendees should be provided with whistles, and whenever Obummer lies (which is all the time), they should blow their whistles.
August 16, 2012 at 2:39 pm
I would add that Cardinal Dolan should include in his speech that this will likely be the last Al Smith dinner ever held. When the HHS mandate kicks in, Catholic Charities will be run out of business like the adoption folks were in Massachusetts. When that happens, the purpose of having these annual dinners is gone.
August 16, 2012 at 3:27 pm
Definitely deserves a repost. Rolling on the floor…
August 16, 2012 at 4:29 pm
Cardinal Dolan is doing the right thing in inviting the president to the dinner. It is an opportunity to emphasize the difference between the two candidates.
I hope the cardinal also takes the opportunity to note the dangers our country faces regarding religious freedom, while showing Christian charity to the guests of the dinner.
I am confident the cardinal will not laud the president, but a demonstration of charity to those with whom we disagree is a Christian principle.
August 16, 2012 at 4:37 pm
The biggest criminals write the rules that make their crimes legal. What part of HHS Mandate that sanctions the killing of babies right up to the moment they take their first breath, and now, any woman,[ this includes young girls at the age of twelve can be sterilized without parental consent,] does the Cardinal and Bishops not understand?
Obama's Chief of Staff made it crystal clear that the virulently anti-life President Obama was done compromising. The same Obama who gave a speech at Notre Dame touting his commitment to conscience protections. Who did so in front of all religious crosses and symbols covered in cloth.
I think a huge statue of Jesus on the Cross should be placed directly behind Obama's chair and a Cross should be place in front of every plate especially Obama's. It would be interesting to see if he covers it with his napkin. At least the symbols of our faith will show up on every photo op he uses to show that the Catholic Cardinal and Bishops put him above his deliberate attempt to destroy the Catholic Church and our constitutional right to Freedom of Religion. Or better yet do as the Pope did to Nancy Pelosi and not allow her to use him as a photo op.
Is this dinner a repeat of Neville Chamberlain’s folly with his naïve document “Peace in our time” after receiving assurances from Hitler in 1938. A lesson learned: that when the “good” innocently accept the assurances of the “evil,” the result is catastrophic.
August 16, 2012 at 4:58 pm
August 16, 2012 at 10:36 pm
Ha! I can't believe I didn't think of that.
August 17, 2012 at 12:07 am
Great list, you inspired me with some of my own suggestions – http://www.splendoroftruth.com/curtjester/2012/08/the-al-smith-dinner-mandate/