The other morning my daughter was singing in the front room. I love listening to her sing to herself but it was funny too because she was mangling the words so badly. But it didn’t bother her at all.
It got me remembering times when either I or my idiot friends completely misunderstood song lyrics. For years, I thought that song by Dobie Gray called “Drift Away” that goes, “Gimme’ the beat boys and free my soul I wanna’ get lost in your rock and roll and drift away.”
Well I thought it said, “Gimme the Beach Boys and free my soul.” I was singing along with it one night years ago and one of my buddies called me out on it and I was mocked mercilessly for weeks.
I admitted this recently at a get-together with friends and people were pretty forthcoming about their mix-ups as well. One girl said she thought “Big Old Jet Airliner” by Steve Miller was actually, “Big Ol’ Jed Left a Light On.” So I mocked her mercilessly for the rest of the night.
Another guy I’d never even met before said he thought for years “Rock the Casbah” was “Rock the Cash Bar.”
Hey, that makes just as much sense if you ask me so I left him alone as I didn’t know him all that well. I just made fun of him a little so he wouldn’t feel left out. What? Some people like being mocked.
Wondering if you’ve got any more. So we can all mock you mercilessly.
May 20, 2009 at 1:19 pm
One of my grade school friends thought “Love Roller Coaster” was “Love the Coast Guard.”
May 20, 2009 at 1:39 pm
My girlfriend has a good one that I teased her about mercilessly:
In the Bonnie Raitt song, “I Can’t Make You Love Me,” she sings:
“Just hold me close, don’t patronize – don’t patronize me.”
My friend thought she was singing:
“Don’t pay tonight – don’t pay tonight”
– she thought it was a song about a prostitute:D!
May 20, 2009 at 1:42 pm
Well I thought it said, “Gimme the Beach Boys and free my soul.” I was singing along with it one night years ago and one of my buddies called me out on it and I was mocked mercilessly for weeks.I thought the same thing (only I was only mocked for a couple days). I think “Beach Boys” totally makes sense there and still sometimes sing along that way.
May 20, 2009 at 2:20 pm
And I thought it was ‘Hey, Roderigo’ until… about two minutes ago. Oh well, Van Morrison doesn’t exactly enunciate.
May 20, 2009 at 2:39 pm
I loved that “‘Scuse me while I kiss this guy” book!
Anyways, I always thought Billy Joel’s “Everybody’s talkin’ ’bout the new sound, funny but it’s still rock n’roll to me” was “Everybody’s talkin’ ’bout the new south funny bunny’s still rock n’roll to me.”
Bu the best one is this girl I went to college with thought that in Rod Stewart’s “Have I told You Lately” when he was singing “Ease my troubles that’s what you do,” she heard, “Ease my troubles, that’s Nockason” as if the girl’s name was Nockason. Guess what M.’s new nickname became?
May 20, 2009 at 2:41 pm
Yeah, I think anyone getting one of Van the Man’s lyrics wrong deserves a break.
But I’m still coming to terms with the fact that Elton John was not singing a love song about Tony Danza.
May 20, 2009 at 2:46 pm
How I knew I was a Catholic before I ever became a Catholic is that for most of my life I thought the words to “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” went like this:
“Through the years we all will be together, If the Saints allow …”
May 20, 2009 at 3:20 pm
I remember my MOM singing “Pour some sugar on me”, but as “Pour some sugar on bread”…Like, MOM! Stop listening to my music!!!
May 20, 2009 at 4:35 pm
How about Lionel Ritchie’s song All Night Long? My dad used to be real puzzled because he thought he heard:
“We’re going to party, karamu, fiesta, forever.
Come on and sing along.
OH NY-LON.
(All night long.)
He thought they were singing about the spandex in that video.
May 20, 2009 at 6:47 pm
I always thought that America’s “Ventura Highway” went:
“Seasons crying, no despair,
Neither gail or blizzards in the air… in the air”Makes perfect sense, driving in southern California on the 101. But, NO… the real lyrics are:
“Seasons crying, no despair
Alligator lizards in the air… in the air”HUH???????? What the heck were they smoking when they wrote that line???
May 20, 2009 at 7:27 pm
I can’t believe that no one else mentioned “there’s a bathroom on the right”…CCR. Of course it is really “There’s a BAD MOON on the Rise”. I think the “Van Morrison” rule should apply to Credence Clearwater Revival too (Foggerty?)
I agree that the “America” lyrics above were certainly substance induced!
May 20, 2009 at 7:28 pm
Oh yeah, I grew up on the New Jersey shore and thought that it was “Give me the BEACH, boy and free my soul…so I wasn’t so far away from you, was I?
May 20, 2009 at 8:20 pm
Glenn Frey’s “Born in the City”
Actual lyrics:You were born in the city,
Concrete under your feet
Former co-worker sings:You were born in the city,
Palm trees under your feet
All of us:Mock her mercilessly.
One of the local radio shows years ago called this “Lyricosis” – singing even though you don’t know the words. Fogerty, Elton, Stewart, Van the Man, and Axl Rose are some of the leading causes. If exposed, please use caution while singing along.
Or as Stevie Nicks almost, not exactly sang:
“Just like Elton John
No one knows the words she’s singing
Ooh, ooh, ooooohhhh….”
May 21, 2009 at 12:23 am
The best warped hearing of lyrics, in my humble opinion, belongs to my dear sister, Jules, who thought that Mick Jagger singing hat “I’ll never be your beast of burden” was in fact “I’ll never leave your beef stew burning”. Go figure!
May 21, 2009 at 3:51 am
My husband would sing “I’m the Leprechaun Gangsta” instead of the “lyrical gangsta”, which lead to plans for a blinged-out leprechaun halloween costume…and has insulated me from any mocking for misheard lyrics.
May 21, 2009 at 2:54 pm
“Purple Haze” provided an existential crises for me in my youth. I KNEW the lyrics were “purple haze, all in my brain,” but my little brother thought it was “put your hands up in my brain.” That’s a pretty standard mix up. But when I insisted that my brother sing it the right way, my mother intervened and said he could sing it how he wanted to. I went on to become a philosophy major, a committed realist, and despiser of post-modern relativism, and I think this moment played an integeral moment in how I ended up. I was furious.
As far as other funny mix ups, if you will remember the Bryan Adams song for the robyn hood movie, “I do it for you” or whatever, the lyrics actually go:
“and no other, could give more love.”
but my brother and I were convinced it was:
“and no other, cookie mountain.”
hey, we were like, 8 and 6 years old or something. A cookie mountain seemed plausable.
The funniest mix up however will have to involve asteriks. I’m blanking on who exactly sings it, but I think its the boss. If not, don’t get mad, I should know this, but I’m blanking. Anyway, the song actually goes:
“blinded by the light…lit up like a deuce in the middle of the night.”
for the longest time, my brother and i were simply amazed at what we thought was playing on the radio:
“blinded by the light…lit up like a d***he in the middle of the night.”
If you don’t know what I am saying, then you are a good person that doesn’t have your mind in the gutter. My brother and I evidently did!
May 21, 2009 at 3:30 pm
I forget who the artist was but the song ‘Up on the Tight Wire’ had the phrase, “You look into my past, but baby your’e just too blind ta…see.’ I thought is was, ‘You look into my pants…’
May 22, 2009 at 1:15 am
CSN&Y's suite judy blue eyes…. "tearing your ci ga rette way from me now, your are free" OR tears for fears "everybody wants to fool around"
May 22, 2009 at 1:15 am
CSN&Y's suite judy blue eyes…. "tearing your ci ga rette way from me now, your are free" OR tears for fears "everybody wants to fool around"
May 22, 2009 at 1:15 am
CSN&Y's suite judy blue eyes…. "tearing your ci ga rette way from me now, your are free" OR tears for fears "everybody wants to fool around"