This past weekend my wife and I had a discussion.

Ok, it wasn’t so much a discussion as it was my wife being wrong about something coupled with my overwhelming compulsion to have her acknowledge said wrongdoing.

See, we had agreed NOT to purchase a certain item that somehow, mysteriously, got purchased anyway. It couldn’t be clearer to me, or any reasonable observer, that I am completely justified in a modicum of snippiness especially since my wife, so clearly in the wrong, refused to admit it.

This is the situation I found myself in the other day. Me, sitting in my chair with my two year old (she turns 3 next week) sitting on my lap watching Man vs. Food. My wife is on the other end of the phone.

The other children were issuing and taking bets as to whether Adam could finish the sixth bowl of incredibly hot chili and thus paid no attention to my, umm…. conversation.

My two year old, in the closer proximity of the highly valued lap seat, listened to everything I said.

“Did we or did we not agree that we would not purchase these ottomans? So why are my feet comfortably perched right now?”

“No, no. I said no, remember?”

“Yes. You CAN make your own decisions, but NOT when I have already decided.”

“No, its not that I hate them. It is just that we agreed not to purchase anything like furniture right now.”

“I appreciate that you can’t stand looking at the old stuff anymore. But we agreed!! We agreed!!!”

So then my little two year old, with her white-blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes looks up to me and says with all the wisdom of Solomon…

“Dad, just say I love you!”


“No. We agreed… No, I said NOT to purchase them right now. Right!? Right?!” I continued.


“Dad!!! Just say I love you!”


“No. You know what? Whatever. I will talk to you when you get home. Good-bye!”

With the phone now hung up. My two year old again looks to me and says.

“Dad. You just say I love you.”


“Oh yeah. What do you know? Six months ago you were pooping your pants!”

[One hour later………..]

The wife. “You know honey. If you really don’t want the ottomans, I can return them.”

“No. I guess its fine. And ummmm….. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Darn kids.