This is the text of a letter from a principal of an elementary school. I shouldn’t even have to comment on this. Pure lunacy speaks for itself.
Global Toronto has the letter:
Dear Parents/Guardians:
These past few weeks, we have had a few serious incidents, staff and students being hit by a hard ball or nearly being hit by a hard ball in our schoolyard. Despite attempts to control the use of soccer balls, footballs, volleyballs and tennis balls and several requests to our students to be careful and mindful of bystanders, we have not been able to ensure the safety of all students and adults.
As a result, starting today, Monday, November 14, 2011, students are not going to be allowed to bring or play with any kind of hard ball to school. Any balls brought will be confiscated and may be retrieved by parents from the office. The only kind of ball allowed will be nerf balls or sponge balls.
We regret that we have had to resort to this measure. We hope that this move will make our schoolyard a safer place to be.
Oh boy.
How will our kids know to duck if they’ve never gotten nailed in the head with a ball?
I wonder if there will be a zero tolerance policy. Cubby searches? Nannyism hurts children. It’s funny, in a few years the same school district will probably be handing these kids condoms and telling them to go out and play.
November 16, 2011 at 9:29 pm
As the mother of a volleyball magnet who has been nailed in the head so many times that she's on a first-name basis with the school nurse, I wholeheartedly endorse this policy. Her school has 4000 students – no, that's not a typo – so being that close to the nurse is a bit ridiculous. It's not that our kids need to learn to duck – it's that the other ones need to learn manners and to stop purposely aiming at our kids. Yes, she has been targeted deliberately because of her petite-for-her-age size. Now if they teach manners and then let them have the volleyball back, I'm all for it!
November 16, 2011 at 10:28 pm
His description of the playground sounds like my house on a daily basis. We have a lot of fun and yes, bruised kids. Now where did I put the football?
House of Boys
November 16, 2011 at 10:29 pm
Soooo, what are they supposed to do during recess now? Schools are already discouraging kids from reading during recess (in the name of physical fitness and such), and now they're not being allowed to play with balls. Amazing.
November 16, 2011 at 11:23 pm
Sounds more like a behavior issue rather than the occasional stray ball issue.
November 16, 2011 at 11:33 pm
Hoya Girl, That sounds like a disciplinary issue. The kids throwing the balls should be disciplined. You don't take away balls from everyone.
November 17, 2011 at 12:22 am
Hard balls? Oh poor oppressed kids who won't get to throw baseballs at each other's heads during recess. Give me a break! They aren't taking away all the balls, they can still throw a Nerf around.
November 17, 2011 at 1:06 am
Don't forget to issue each child a helmet for navigating the halls! What a bunch of Marys.
I grew up in the era of lawn darts. During gym class we threw each other up in the air with old army-issue parachutes. So what do I know? I may be brain damaged.
November 17, 2011 at 1:19 am
I was my experience monitoring my kids Catholic school playground that made me homeschool. Big kids waiting until adults turned around and then pelting poor unsuspecting little ones in the head with all manner of things including basketballs and handballs. I agree it is a discipline issue, but when the principal won't get rid of the offenders because they pay full tuition, what else is there to do?
November 17, 2011 at 3:19 am
Maybe this explains Item #10 on Patrick's son's Christmas list.
November 17, 2011 at 11:16 am
The government schoolmasters have been sissifying kids for years now. Gotta make 'em passive and docile, ya know. Next thing you know, they're "occupying" parts of major U.S. cities making incoherent demands. Goodbye, America.
November 17, 2011 at 2:26 pm
Last year, my kids' Catholic school issued a "No Contact" rule for recess. No soccer, football, or even tag.
My kids complained all year. They used to love recess, like any normal kid, but they had trouble finding something to do that followed the new rule. They came home complaining about recess, and how boring and cold it was.
They changed the rule this year.
November 17, 2011 at 5:01 pm
This is what happens when women are in charge. Enjoy the decline.
November 17, 2011 at 8:44 pm
Anonymous said…
This is what happens when women are in charge. Enjoy the decline.
November 17, 2011 12:01 PM
Absolutely true. Get 'em out of politics, too.
November 17, 2011 at 8:52 pm
Soccer balls don't hurt you, it's the elbow to the eye as you're trying to head the ball that does.
November 17, 2011 at 9:09 pm
"… but when the principal won't get rid of the offenders because they pay full tuition, what else is there to do?…"
That's an easy one.
Pay up and tell your kid to give 'em Hell.
Kid's with full paid tuition deserve a little extra.
*
November 17, 2011 at 11:09 pm
>Anonymous said…
>>Anonymous said…
>>This is what happens when women are in charge. Enjoy the decline. (November 17, 2011 12:01 PM)
>Absolutely true. Get 'em out of politics, too. (November 17, 2011 3:44 PM)
And keep them out of the hierarchy. Imagine if we had women priests and bishops.
November 18, 2011 at 10:30 am
Could be the principal sees the possibility of litigation against the school for failing to protect any bystander(s): CYA.
November 22, 2011 at 12:52 am
To me this is a dumb rule because hard sports balls are a fact of athletics. Back when I was in grade school we were actually "punished" by the gym teacher by lining up all in a row and having balls thrown at our rear ends while we were bent over, but a lot of us were not even hit and I don't recall any student or parent calling for a ban on these balls or the gym class itself over this issue. I enjoyed most of gym class.
November 22, 2011 at 3:08 pm
Put a condom over your head. Safe Play!
Thankfully, they'll never ban condoms.