You have to admit, mankind is finding new and creative ways to call down divine wrath. The latest scientific “advance” sure to eventually precipitate biblical comeuppance is a doozy. What do you get for the lesbian who has everything? Why, her own sperm of course. From Technology Review.

Good news for lesbians who want to have biological children related to both parents: a new stem-cell technique could allow scientists to convert female cells into sperm. Use that sperm to fertilize an egg, and voila: children with two female biological parents.

In unpublished work reported by New Scientist and the Telegraph, British scientists at the University of Newcastle coaxed female embryonic stem cells to develop into primitive sperm cells. Next, the researchers, led by stem-cell biologist Karim Nayernia, plan to create sperm cells from female bone marrow, making the procedure more practical.

Just in time too, I was running out of gift ideas for Ellen Degeneres. Now women won’t need men at all. Which means that women might eventually just ignore us all together. Wait, this might not be so bad after all.