In this heated election season, thousands of straw men have been created with the express purpose of being knocked down, says the spokesperson of a Strawman advocacy organization.
Save the Straw Men was created to raise awareness of the horrors done to straw men who are often created on a whim only to be intentionally knocked down and discarded.
“I don’t get it. These people create us only to knock us down,” said one straw man who was created to further the argument that pro-lifers only want to push religion on others -much like during the Inquisition.
“Nobody even knew what he was talking about,” said the straw man of his creator. “Frankly, I’m disappointed. I mean who would create life just to destroy it?”
Other strawmen created recently include that pro-lifers only care about babies in the womb and shunning them once they’re out, those who don’t want to pay higher taxes are unpatriotic, and if you try to bring up Jeremiah Wright in political discourse you’re attempting to fan the flames of racism.
Straw men all around America who’ve been created and raised with the express purpose of being knocked down are finally organizing. “Veal are treated better than us for goodness sake,” said one straw man who had fallen on hard times after being raised in an argument for the minimum wage.
Even in these enlightened times, the mortality rate of straw men has not decreased and remains at about 100 percent. In fact, the only time straw men survive even for a short time is when the person creating them simply forgets the point they were trying to make.
This election season has seen a drastic increase in the number of straw men created with cable shows centered around thin arguments and bombastic accusations, bloggers arguing with each other in the comboxes, and even candidates intentionally misconstruing each others words.
Straw men are seeking legislation to protect themselves but ironically some politicians actually created more strawmen to argue against the bill by arguing that protecting strawmen might include protecting scarecrows which could hurt farmers and their families.
October 8, 2008 at 2:43 pm
I think your choice of the term “Straw Man” shows an insensitivity to women. The correct term is “Straw Person”.
My 24 year-old niece forwarded me an e-mail from Hillary Clinton stating that conservatives were attempting to pass legislation that would threaten the rights and health of women: support Hillary’s fight to protect women and sign the on-line petition! No description was given of the proposed legislation. When I pointed this out to my niece she had no interest in finding out what the facts were: Hillary saying it was so was enough to get her fired up to e-mail everyone she knew about it.
Trouble with Straw Men is no one recognizes them. Maybe they are an underserved minority?
October 8, 2008 at 8:13 pm
Clever stuff!
October 8, 2008 at 10:44 pm
This country needs to change how it treats straw men and straw women. We need hope. We need to have an actual, rational discussion where having an opinion that would impose some limits on people doesn’t result in them being slandered as bigots, idiots, and religious zealots. That’s change I can believe in — because it’s the right kind of change.
~Zee
October 8, 2008 at 10:59 pm
So are you supporting bale out legislation for strawmen now?
October 9, 2008 at 6:43 am
I’m hesitant to support Save the Straw Men; there don’t seem to be any brains in the operation.
October 9, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Good stuff guys.I love when comboxes devolve into forums for one-liners.
October 10, 2008 at 5:17 am
Well, we all have to make hay while the sun shines.