My father used to say there aren’t many problems that couldn’t be solved with a little duct tape. But liberals today seem to think there’s nothing that can’t be solved by condoms. Condoms are the liberal ShamWOW! It’ll clean up any mess.
Truly, what is it with liberals and condoms? The solution to global warming? Condoms. Solution to HIV? Condoms. Poverty? Condoms. The deficit? Condoms. Solution to abortion? Condoms.
In fact, the only time liberals even talk about trying to reduce abortions is when they’re trying to push free condoms.
The federal government has given out millions and millions of condoms at this point but none of these problems are resolved. We’ve sent so many condoms to Africa, every single person there could build spacious rubber rafts and just row to America for goodness sakes.
In fact, liberals so love condoms that one of the first things President Obama did as President was to force American taxpayers to ship condoms to everyone outside the United States -and in case that didn’t work there’s always abortion.
So now that the United States will be throwing enough money to cover every other country in the whole world in synthetic rubber, I’m guessing the liberals began feeling a little jealous and wondering what they could do to increase the supply of domestic condoms.
The answer came today. Obama is hijacking George W. Bush’s Office of Faith Based Programs, renaming it, and tweaking their mission just a wee bit so that their main job will be doling out condoms right here in the good old U.S. of A. And guess what they’re labeling it – abortion reduction!
Note to newly renamed Faith Based Office of whatever – contraception leads to more extra-marital sex which leads to unwanted babies which leads to more abortions. It’s really not that difficult. But they don’t really care about truth. Their obsession with condoms doesn’t allow for truth.
According to NPR:
President Obama launches his faith-based programs today, appointing pastor Josh DuBois to head up operations. The program departs from President Bush’s by focusing on family planning…
According to the USCCB,
a study published in the August 18, 2000 British Medical Journal shows that teens who consult with medical professionals about contraception actually have a higher rate of pregnancy than those who don’t. As to contraception reducing the number of abortions, other studies show that “over 80 percent of young women who have had abortions are contraceptively experienced.” In fact, according to the Alan Guttmacher Institute, over half of women having abortions say they were using a contraceptive in the month they became pregnant.
Can any person believe right now that any of our problems in America are actually due to a lack of condoms? Well I guess at least one person…and unfortunately he’s our President.
February 6, 2009 at 4:25 am
So are you saying the Stimulus package is just one great big Trojan horse?
February 6, 2009 at 11:41 am
[bass drum-hi hat] Don’t forget to tip your waitress.
February 6, 2009 at 12:07 pm
“Truly, what is it with liberals and condoms? The solution to global warming? Condoms. Solution to HIV? Condoms. Poverty? Condoms. The deficit? Condoms. Solution to abortion? Condoms.
In fact, the only time liberals even talk about trying to reduce abortions is when they’re trying to push free condoms.”
Matthew, I love you! This is awesome.
February 6, 2009 at 2:24 pm
Wouldn’t you expect the kids who consult with their doctors about contraception to have a higher rate of pregnancy???
Because the ones who DON’T ask? They’re probably not having sex……..
(I always insisted on having my mom in the room for checkups in highschool so I WOULDN’T have to listen to the Dr. talk about such things!!!! )
February 6, 2009 at 2:49 pm
My wife and I still got the contraception speech after the delivery of our fifth child. I mean, what about five children do they not understand?
Or perhaps that’s why they’re trying to give it to us.
We politely interrupted and said we weren’t interested. The doctor actually sighed and walked out.
February 6, 2009 at 3:56 pm
Condoms – the lesser of two evils. One forgets that good is an option too. Instead of abortion or contraception how about abortion or adoption & contraception or abstinence. Why do people set the bar too low for our youth? Why do people think that they are not capable of discipline & higher ideals? I’ve taught in an African American inner city school and a Caucasian American suburban exclusive school and I have found that regardless of socio-economic status, the youth are capable of greatness and holiness. And yet we throw condoms at them as though they are beasts. Has no one heard of the Pygmalion Effect?
February 6, 2009 at 4:43 pm
I’m linking to this. This was excellent, and funny, though true, and the comments are bang on.
Thank you for another great post!
February 6, 2009 at 5:05 pm
Great post! This is so true. I live in the capital of Liberal – the UK. Turns out though that condoms are not such a great solution – we’ve been giving them out to kids like there is no tomorrow. Turns out there is a tomorrow and its even worse than yesterday;-) Seriously Obama’s policy sounds a lot like Blair’s – as a teacher of teenagers I can tell you it doen’t work. We will just keep on praying and keep on posting.
February 6, 2009 at 5:11 pm
Great post, Matthew.
Too tired to make a funny comment. Sorry.
February 6, 2009 at 5:24 pm
LarryD – hahahahaha! Perfect.
February 6, 2009 at 8:09 pm
Matthew. This is too funny. I gave birth 2 months ago to our 6th child. My midwife came in and started the conversation about birth control. I listened intently while she talked about an IUD and how that was such a good option for her because she didn’t want to be an old woman with a bunch of children. I laughed and said “What? Like me?” Her entire face turned red and out she walked. I guess she didn’t get it….
February 6, 2009 at 9:05 pm
My midwife came in and started the conversation about birth control.
This is how far it is gone. Although we didn’t get a contraceptive lecture, we did get a questionaire with “what kind of birth control are you using?” Not, “Are you using birth control?” Also, Kimberly Hahn iirc, relates a story about signing a release for C-section and was erroneously given a form that included permission to tie her tubes. She spotted the error in time, but it highlights the medical profession’s view: pregnancy is a threat.
February 7, 2009 at 12:52 am
Speaking of condoms… Can someone explain to me how NFP is any less manipulative than the use of condoms?
I accept the Churches teaching… However, it seems to me that NFP is just as bad as using a condom. Both methods are used to prevent pregnancy. One method is just more effective. In either case, are those who use either method any less open to having children?
Personally, I believe NFP is another V2 loosing of the ‘rules’ sort of speak. If we are supposed to be open to life, I don’t see how NFP fits into our traditional faith.
Please enlighten me. I am open to hearing arguments/justifications in this matter.
In Christ,
Mark
February 7, 2009 at 2:44 am
mmediately, some people may honestly ask, “What is the difference between Natural Family Planning and artificial birth control? Both seem to do the same thing.” While both means may have the same intent postponing pregnancy the difference lies in the means themselves. With Natural Family Planning, couples keep their covenant of life and love intact. They use only the means given to them by God, which are intrinsic to who they are. In expressing their marital love, they are mindful that this action not only unites them as husband and wife, but also may participate in God’s creative love. Rather than suppress and ignore one dimension, they respect both dimensions. Therefore, if they decide for a serious reason to postpone a pregnancy, then both husband and wife make the decision and both share in the sacrifice of not expressing their marital love during the period of ovulation. Natural Family Planning is also safe and the burden shared by both husband and wife. Moreover the couple is open to the providence of God’s will. If a child should come who “was not planned?” so be it—that is God’s will and God’s gift. With artificial birth control, where the couple has everything nicely planned and is in control, the surprise pregnancy oftentimes spells disaster. Remember that one of the arguments for legalized abortion is to correct “unplanned pregnancies.”
http://www.ewtn.com/library/ANSWERS/PRACTNFP.HTM
February 7, 2009 at 1:39 pm
The error people make when equating NFP and contraception is good ol’ fashion consequentialism. So they look at the ends: Contraception=no pregnancy, NFP=no pregnancy and wrongly conclude that the objective means are morally the same. T’aint so, and if you think about it, it’s hard to tell a significant difference between the dissident liberal and the extreme conservative in that it is the same basic error (consequentialism) and they merely have different manifestations of that error.
February 7, 2009 at 1:41 pm
I wasn’t convinced about the validity of NFP for 20 yrs. Just last year I was able to attend a GOOD presentation, by a couple who used NFP to conceive. The husband was a doctor who had previously prescribed contraception, and he spoke about his ‘conversion’.
Many people , however, are still subjected to the ‘marriage prep’ 1 hr (or less) NFP as loophole presentation, as we were.
I believe the push for condom distribution is actually to increase abortions. The affect is known, so the result must be anticipated. (assuming intelligent life) It is a business, after all!
February 7, 2009 at 2:35 pm
There’s also the difference that NFP is used in order to get pregnant, not just to space out pregnancies.
February 9, 2009 at 4:38 pm
mfranks,
You do make a good point, though. NFP can be immorally used (although it is not intrinsically immoral), for example if the couple just doesn’t “feel” like having another child. Note the EWTN posting just after yours, made by Rick – “…if they decide for a serious reason…” Thus, the reason for postponing pregnancy must be something that is not frivolous in origin (serious financial difficulty, illness, etc). One of the problems of contraception, regardless of the fact that it is intrinsically immoral, is that it makes pregnancy a commodity, and people entirely avoid pregnancy because they don’t feel like it’s convenient.
February 11, 2009 at 1:51 am
This is a wonderful post! To those who are trying to distinguish between NFP and artificial contraception, please see this post.