Churches bad. Abortion clinics good. You got that?

No seriously. Check this lunacy out. I mean this is like conversation between Gary Busey and Jeff Conway kind of crazy. The ACLU obviously believes that churches are so dangerous to minors that they’re freaking out because some football coach took some players to his church. But if a student wants to go to an abortion clinic, the ACLU is all for it and will fight like a caged wombat so that young people don’t need permission slips from their parents to skip school to kill their unborn children.

Compare and contrast these two stories. reports:

The head football coach at Breckinridge County High School took about 20 players on a school bus late last month to his church, where nearly half of them were baptized, school officials say.

The mother of one player said her 16-year-old son was baptized without her knowledge and consent, and she is upset that a public school bus was used to take players to a church service — and that the school district’s superintendent was there and did not object…

Superintendent Janet Meeks, who is a member of the church and witnessed the baptisms, said she thinks the trip was proper because attendance was not required, and another coach paid for the gas.

Meeks said parents weren’t given permission slips to sign but knew the event would include a church service, if not specifically a baptism. She said eight or nine players came forward and were baptized. “None of the players were rewarded for going and none were punished for not going,” Meeks said.

David Friedman, general counsel for the American Civil Liberties Union of Kentucky, said in an interview that the trip would appear to violate Supreme Court edicts on the separation of church and state — even if it was voluntary and the school district didn’t pay for the fuel.

“If players want to attend the coach’s church and get baptized, that’s great,” Friedman said. But a coach cannot solicit player attendance at school, he said, noting, “Coaches have great power and persuasion by virtue of their position, and they have to stay neutral.”

So the ACLU has a problem with minors being taken to church services if the school is in any way associated with it?

I’m going to pretend to be flabbergasted here in order to heighten the drama like Matlock used to do when he had the goods on some suspect who was sitting there all smug and stuff while testifying to his innocence.

And I’d act all coy until I dropped the bomb like, “But isn’t this the same ACLU that in March of this year advocated the school keeping parents in the dark if students so that children could leave the school in order to acquire an abortion!”

Whoa! Gasps from the jury. An admiring glance from the wise judge. Maybe a sly wink from the court stenographer. And me just all sitting there like butter wouldn’t melt in my mouth.

But it’s all true. The ACLU fought for schools allowing children to leave school to get an abortion without a permission slip but now they’re saying that a football coach can’t take kids to a church? I rest my case. I’d slap down the corroborating evidence like this from Fox News which reported in March:

The ACLU is threatening to sue a California school district after it changed a policy to require teenagers get parental consent to leave campus for confidential medical services.

The Vista Unified School District board voted unanimously Thursday to change its existing policy that allowed students to be excused for confidential appointments — including abortions — without notifying parents, according to the North County Times.

The ACLU of San Diego County and the National Center for Youth Law claim the new policy violates state law, KPBS reported.

So, according to the ACLU, schools are required to allow children to abortion clinics and leave parents in the dark but if the students go to church then the parents need to be informed. I can’t wait until the day that everyone realizes that the ACLU is an organization of lunatics bent on the destruction of America as we know it.