Since the term “sl@t” for women who pronounce they’re having sex and you have to pay for it is no longer acceptable, as has been shown by what will come to be known as the Limbaugh debacle, it seems our culture is in desperate need of a euphemistic replacement for the offensive term.
1) Undocumented harlot
2) Vertically challenged
3) Morally and physically flexible
4) Super-duper tolerant
5) Democrat (Ok. That one may have gone too far.)
6) The working spore (That one definitely went too far.)
7) HHS employee
8) Future reality star
9) Planned Parenthood Preferred Customer
Any addition to this list would be welcome.
March 8, 2012 at 6:22 pm
Remember, its not the miles, its the mileage.
March 8, 2012 at 6:26 pm
any words for the guys who sleep around? or is this only my gender's problem?
March 8, 2012 at 6:29 pm
Available for public consumption?
Her spirit is willing and so is her flesh?
A Wilt Chamberlain aficionado?
A rabbit aficionado?
An unrecorded adult movie star? (If she has been recorded, change to "unpublished.")
A good cardio workout?
I'm sure I can get some more. I'll have to think a little longer, though.
And priest's wife, many of my suggestions can be subtly altered to be gender neutral.
March 8, 2012 at 6:35 pm
A Fluke?
March 8, 2012 at 6:36 pm
This post is unworthy of a Christian gentleman. Christ would never have used any of these terms with the woman caught in adultery. Why are you wasting time on this?
March 8, 2012 at 6:52 pm
Too funny! I appreciate your sense of humor!
March 8, 2012 at 6:55 pm
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March 8, 2012 at 6:57 pm
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March 8, 2012 at 7:07 pm
I wish I could find who said this, but whomever it was was clearly wise. It goes something like this.
"The worst insult you can give a woman is to call her a whore, the worst insult you can give a man is to call him a liar."
I have to admit I'm with Pattymelt on this one, though I have to admit, my knee jerk reaction was to come up with a couple more definitions. I think instead, I'll drop my stones.
March 8, 2012 at 7:13 pm
As the mother of a fun-sized daughter (i.e. petite), I take offense at "vertically challenged" on her behalf. The rest of the list is GREAT! 🙂
March 8, 2012 at 7:20 pm
Sorry, this is just gross and below your dignity.
March 8, 2012 at 7:46 pm
I agree with James and Pattymelt. This is unworthy of discussion. I've been following your blog for years now and I've been turned off by your posts since this whole debacle.
March 8, 2012 at 8:17 pm
Christ defended the woman who was caught in adultery and presented to him as a trap, and He forgave her. He also warned her not to sin again.
Christ called the pharisees variously "hypocrites" and "sons of the Devil".
Compare: A woman who is manifestly guilt of slatternly behavior, proud of it, insists on her right to behave that way, and demands not only that others oblige her but contribute to her activities.
My criticism of this tack is not that it's gross but that it's snide. You're playing their wordgame, Archbold. You're going to lose. She's a slut, plain and simple. Don't acquiesce to their level.
March 8, 2012 at 8:34 pm
your words, in this post and the last post, are heartbreaking. please, please, please, for the love of God and your Church, quit saying hurtful things to make a point. you are sinking to a sad level and giving the "other side" ammunition. are we not better than name-calling and mocking those obviously in need of mercy and charity?
you are frustrated and upset and i get it, i really do, but you need a better way of dealing with it other than lashing out (even if you are trying to be funny…which you are not)try using your platform to inform the faithful and then inspire them to pray for the conversion of sinners (that would be all of us…)
March 8, 2012 at 8:35 pm
To the people who think it's soooo unkind of Matt to ask for new names to describe a sl@t, you would have criticized the prophets Ezechiel and Isaiah for their colorfull descriptions of the male and female sl@ts of their days. Don't apologise or wimp out Matt, the holy prophets got your back!
March 8, 2012 at 9:01 pm
I have always liked 'trollop' and vixen. Vamp, shrew, slattern, and woman-of -questionable-virtue, are also appropriate. I agree there should be more names for men, as player and playboy seem to lack the same punch as the terms for women. I also agree that the whole thing is a bit like the lowest common denominator… but it is funny.
March 8, 2012 at 9:07 pm
scotju is right. Jesus got your back too.
"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint and dill and cummin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law, justice and mercy and faith; these you ought to have done, without neglecting the others. You blind guides, straining out a gnat and swallowing a camel! … Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within they are full of dead men's bones and all uncleanness."
Jesus called Peter Satan to his face. He could really throw it down.
March 8, 2012 at 10:54 pm
"Little Ms. Hornier then Though" touches on the high minded indignation that the whole episode has generated from the purveyors of all such things immoral.
March 8, 2012 at 10:56 pm
A "lost soul in need of Christ" is what I would call her and is all I see when her image in shown in the media.
🙁
I pity her, she has no understanding of what human sexuality is supposed to be and calling her 'sl@t' isn't what Christ would have done to one so lost in delusions.
Sadly I too have given in to name calling on occasion and feel bad for it later. I think a Hail Mary for her would be much more helpful and the Christian thing to do rather than list making- most especially during this Lenten season. JMO
March 8, 2012 at 11:17 pm
I would love, love LOVE it if somebody would persuade my insurance company to cover the cost of a fertility monitor and classes to learn the Marquette Method, or to review our current NFP method. However, if I did… wouldn't that also make me a slut, tramp, etc.
Shame on you.