My five year old is a kindergarten graduate so she’s home now and was watching television today. On came Max and Ruby, a cartoon about two child rabbits who live without any parent in sight, and still find ways to be so mind numbingly boring that I was hoping the storm would cause a blackout.

My five year old looked up at me shocked and said, “Ha, this is still on?!” as if she’d been away from television for years and was shocked to see an old favorite was still on. At the end of the show, Nickelodeon posted that the episode of Max and Ruby taught children about conflict resolution.

My five year old looked up at me and pointed at the television, saying, “I’m telling you right now Dad I didn’t learn anything from Max and Ruby. They’re lying.”

I agreed.

Then she asked to watch Justice League while she pulled all the cushions off the couch so she could jump off the couch and pretend to fight bad guys. She said at least Justice League taught her how to fight bad guys.