Fox News reported that a group of atheists all got together to get themselves “debaptized” and they did this by using a hair dryer and muttering some phrases in Latin that they likely ripped off some episode of “Supernatural” or “Buffy.”
This is sad. America simply has to get better quality atheist. Our atheists are carnival barkers. This is an insult to adolescent rebellion. Look, England’s atheists aren’t all that great but at least they write bestselling books. Our atheists use hair dryers on Nightline.
Come on American atheists you’re being embarrassed.
Leading atheist Edwin Kagin blasted his fellow non-believers with the hair dryer to symbolically dry up the holy water sprinkled on their heads in days past. The styling tool was emblazoned with a label reading “Reason and Truth.”
Kagin believes parents are wrong to baptize their children before they are able to make their own choices, even slamming some religious education as “child abuse.” He said the blast of hot air was a way for adults to undo what their parents had done.
“I was baptized Catholic. I don’t remember any of it at all,” said 24-year-old Cambridge Boxterman. “According to my mother, I screamed like a banshee … so you can see that even as a young child I didn’t want to be baptized. It’s not fair. I was born atheist, and they were forcing me to become Catholic.”
Kagin donned a monk’s robe and said a few mock-Latin phrases before inviting those wishing to be de-baptized to “come forward now and receive the spirit of hot air that taketh away the stigma and taketh away the remnants of the stain of baptismal water.”
Ironically, Kagin’s own son became a fundamentalist Christian minister after having “a personal revelation in Jesus Christ.”
“One wonders where they went wrong,” he chuckled to the TV show.
Oh give me a break. Kagin’s own son became a Christian!? That has to hurt.
The funniest part is that they’re still baptized. And they know it. Now they’ll say they don’t care but then I have to ask why go through the silly hair dryer ceremony if the baptism isn’t a big deal?