Now that the media has decided that the children of candidates are now fair game to be reported on, the staff here at CMR along with other media organizations have begun investigating the past of the two Obama girls.
In what some are considering a stunning development, one of Barack Obama’s daughters, age six, was seen in class coloring outside the lines. “This is a disturbing development,” said one news reporter who has obtained the drawings in question which will be previewed tonight in an hour long special. “This isn’t just a little out of the lines but even the colors don’t make sense. She painted the hippo purple. I’ve never seen a purple hippo. Nobody has.”
Some speculate that this erratic coloring could show that maybe Michelle Obama has too much on her plate to take time to color with her children.
And even more stunning, one of the daughters may have “faked sick” last year. Eight of her nine absences are seen by many as legitimate but some eyewitnesses say the 9 year old bragged to schoolmates about how she “totally faked” in order to get out of school. Some experts are asking that perhaps if Michelle and Barack were not so consumed with their campaign, they clearly would have noticed that she was running around all morning and singing along with Elmo. “That’s just not how a sick kids acts,” said a neighbor.
Child psychologist Ida Yote said, “Sometimes when a child “fakes” sick, it’s indicative of a larger problem that warrants attention.”
Some foreign policy experts are asking, “if a nine year old child can fool Barack Obama, what do you think Putin will get away with in a face-to-face with Obama?”
The nine year old also reportedly “snitched” on the six year old for something one family member said, “she didn’t even do.” One of the daughters reportedly told her mother that the shirt she was wearing was clean even though she took it right out of her hamper. Dirty laundry, indeed.
Developments of these kind will almost certainly cast a pall over the Obama campaign as liberals may become disillusioned by the Obamas because of the familial squabbles and deceptions.
And although the media has been scrutinizing candidate’s families, the media is still currently ignoring the the very real possible ethics violations of lobbyist Joe Biden Jr. because those allegations could actually cause real trouble for Obama, who sought more than $3.4 million in congressional earmarks for clients of the lobbyist son of his Democratic running mate.