Tonight my son asked me when we were eating dinner. It was 7:30 p.m. He’d honestly forgotten that I made dinner and he’d eaten it. So I reminded him what we’d eaten and he seemed pretty o.k. with it after I told him.
A little later, my eleven year old asked me if we’d have a vacation this summer. I reminded her that we went to the Poconos for a week last month. Oh, she said and trotted away happily.
You know, I’m starting to think children are kinda’ dumb. This isn’t revolutionary, I know. I’ve always suspected it. They don’t remember anything. I’m thinking that for now on I’m going to save the money and not do anything with them and then just tell them we had loads of fun. I’m pretty sure they won’t know any better.
August 22, 2011 at 2:45 am
My second son asks all the time if we said grace so that he can start eating. And we're always like, "yeah, 30 seconds ago!"
August 22, 2011 at 3:41 am
Sadly, it doesn't seem improve with time!
August 22, 2011 at 4:40 am
It's the charm of youth: remembering things only puts lines on one's face. A useful paradigm: little kids are like dogs: utterly dependent, almost never truly mean, a little dense at times, charming even when not doing the most correct thing, loving beyond reason. Adolescents, however, are like cats: they live in your house, but reject you and seemingly don't understand a word said in their direction. They ruin stuff while assuming all will be provided for them. They run away when the 'big people' have friends over, but then demand attention on their own, inscrutable schedule. Internalizing this distinction would save a great deal of heartache!
August 22, 2011 at 5:06 am
A common phenomenon–as described in Bill Cosby's stand-up skit "Brain Damage"
August 22, 2011 at 5:53 am
The summer after they graduate from high school, you can save a ton of money if you tell them they already went to college!
August 22, 2011 at 6:12 am
I disagree. I still vividly remember the Sunday morning that my oldest sister sat at the edge of my bed and told me, "We have no more Daddy. Get dressed, we have to go to the hospital." I still miss my Dad, who died when I was 12. So I try to be around for my son, who's now 11.
August 22, 2011 at 6:19 am
Victor, I am very sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine how it would feel to lose your father at age 12.
For what it's worth, I am pretty sure that Matthew does in fact try to be a good dad and to do things with his kids, but that he's just making a bit of a joke here.
August 22, 2011 at 7:22 am
Dude,
Buzz kill.
August 22, 2011 at 4:44 pm
So now you can see what teachers must experience…
August 22, 2011 at 5:35 pm
Actually, I think that kids remember *everything*. My daughter will bust out little tidbits that she heard a month ago with no intervening reminder. Swear in front of a kid once and they will remember that word.
August 22, 2011 at 7:45 pm
Just yesterday I told my eight year-old to put on her dress and get ready for mass. 20 minutes later with the other 5 of us ready to go she was still in her pajamas watching TV. She said I never told her to get ready even though I was sure to make eye contact with her when I told her. Therefore we couldn't make it to our parish for mass. Her "punishment" was that we attended a later and much longer mass at another parish.
August 22, 2011 at 8:47 pm
You must be an outstanding cook! Try Tabasco.
August 24, 2011 at 5:14 pm
I believe the most annoying question on Earth is "What's for dinner?" I only have 4 kids but I am asked that question at least 12 times in one day. I answer it once and then spend the rest of the day saying, "I already told you. Search your brain for the menu!"
August 25, 2011 at 5:11 pm
You could have saved yourself a whole bunch of money on the vacation and just TOLD your kids you went. That's what we do.
http://www.kissingtheleper.com