I just read that the great Greg and Jennifer Willits, who host “The Catholics Next Door” are filming their own Catholic sitcom. I think this is a great idea. And here’s the thing. I think I can help. I’ve watched a lot of television in my life. My parents had seven kids. They didn’t know where I was about three quarters of the time so I watched a lot of Silver Spoons, Brady Bunch, and Growing Pains. And I sat inches from the screen in order to absorb every miscommunication, every punchline, and every catchphrase.
That’s right. Every show needs a catchphrase. If you don’t have it, you’re sunk. So here’s some suggestions for the Willits on possible catchphrases for a Catholic sitcom. And I think they’d appreciate if you could add yours to the combox.
1) Whatchoo talking about, Jesuit?
2) I’ve fallen and I can get up.
3) Not that there’s not anything wrong with that.
4) Dyno-mitre!
5) We’re not worthy…but we’re forgiven!
6) Q. Hey, where ya’ heading?
A. To Purgatory unless I change my ways.
7) Born again? Nah, once is enough for me!
8) Stultus ego dolui! (which is “I pity the fool” in Latin. I don’t think we have to worry about a lawsuit because there’s no way Mr. T speaks Latin.)
9) Follow me if you want to live. (Said like a Terminator.)
10) I love it when an encyclical comes together.
My quick suggestion is that at the end of the pilot, the Pope breaks a lamp. Everyone looks at him and one of the smart alecky kids says, “So much for infallible,” and they all laugh and then the frame freezes. Pope puts his hands on his hips but then smiles. Fade to black.
Please add more catchphrases of your own.
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